Truth Tapes or Can’t spell family without L
by Crazy4Moony
Summary: L finds tapes about Wammy's inhibitants. They watch them, and find out stuff that they're not supposed to know. How does the Wammy-family function? And what's between L and Mello? Matsuda and the others would like to know! CHAPTER SIX IS RATED M SO BEWARE
1. Where they're kids and Mello's angry

**Truth Tapes/Can't spell family without L**

**AN: ****I messed up the ages a bit... so just ignore that, 'kay! And well, the concept is really simple... to the actual use of the tapes... you'll have to read the other chapters to find out éh ;) Oh, so, the tapes are a bit messed up, and they flip between ages, as in: sometimes there's images of when they were young, then of when they're older again, and then when they're young again :)**

Can't spell family without L: Part one: where they're kids and Mello's angry.

L stared at the tapes and then at the screen. He needed some relax-time and was quite curious as to what was on the videos. He'd found them in one of the carton boxes that Watari had put in his room. "Wammy-stuff." He'd said, without further comment.

The videos were labelled with numbers; starting at one and going on like that. He glanced at Light, who was tapping away on the keys, at the others, who were sipping tea and discussing the case, and then back at his computer.

Making up his mind, he put in the tape labelled 'one' and stared at the biggest monitor, waiting for something to happen. In two seconds flat a young Mello appeared on screen, talking to a young Matt. Little Near was quiet on the background. Mello was dressed in his black jammies, and his rosary hung loosely around his neck, in one fist he was clamping onto a bar of chocolate. Matt already had his trade-mark goggles, and his hair was sticking out from all sorts of places, huffs of red all around. Near was just a small, white fluffy ball. One that was making a puzzle, of course.

"No! We're calling it White Flower!" Mello ranted on, apparently forgetting he was in front of a camera.

L blinked and all the others focussed their attention to the screen. Watari frowned slightly. Some looked expectantly, hoping on new info. But when they saw the children, they started thinking they were watching a television-show or something. Though it was obvious these tapes were home-made.

"But that's such a stupid name," Matt whined. "Let's call it Mario Bros!"

He was staring at Mello with pleading eyes, but Mello stomped his foot and glared.

"We're not naming it after a video-game Matt!" He pushed back a lock of stray blonde hair. "White flower is none-sensicall and that's why we're calling it that!"

"Near!" Matt whined, flopping off his chair and dramatically crawling to the pale boy. "Tell him not to call it that!"

"We should call it L." Near said, fitting a piece into his puzzle.

They were quiet.

So were L and Light and everyone at Headquarters.

Then Mello's face got read and he exploded: "WELL TOUGH TITTIES WE AIN'T CALLING IT THAT! IT DON'T EVEN HAVE SYLLABLES! IT'S JUST ONE LETTER! AND L KEEPS ON FUCKING LEAVING US! WHY THE CRAP WOULD WE CALL IT AFTER STUPID, SELF-CENSORED, THICK-HEADED, ALWAYS ABANDONING US, L!"

L blinked once, tipping his head to the side. Mello had never said anything like that right to his face—he'd known that Mello was sensitive when it came to him having to leave, but not like this.

"Hey Mells," Matt didn't blink at the outburst, but crawled back and put a soothing hand on Mello's arm. He was still on his knees, looking up comforting at him. Because it was Matt, and Matt knew when Mello was pissed and when he was plain hurt. "Relax. No insulting the Mario dude," he always called L 'the Mario dude'. "We'll find a..."

But Near interrupted him: "because you can't spell 'family' without L, that's why we should call it that."

Mello turned to him. Near tilted his head. They stared at each other for a few seconds, then Mello turned to the camera. It was as if he was able to look right into the headquarters, making eye-contact with every single one of them. Then he took a bite of his nearly-melted chocolate and said, completely emotionless: "this is 'Can't spell family without L' and we're making this for the grandchildren we'll never have. Thanks for watching so far!" He waved, Matt winked from the floor and Near returned to the puzzle.

The screen went black for a second, and L started thinking. 'Can't spell family without L'. It was really sweet, but he still didn't get the concept of the tapes. He wondered if maybe Matt and Mello had just been bored and decided to do something stupid.

Before he could think another proper thought, vision returned again. This time Matt was holding the camera, goggles around his neck and face flushed with excitement. He also seemed to be having white stripes on his face... flower?

"None-existing grand-children, welcome to 'Can't spell family without L'!" He started walking. "You have to check this shit out! We made something completely awesome!"

The camera turned and a big, strawberry-covered cake came in view. L almost started drooling. But all they could really see were the strawberries. Matt zoomed out, and they now could distinguish the form of the cake. It was the letter 'L' with one candle on top, because there wasn't room for more—everything else was covered with strawberries.

After the good view of the cake, Matt zoomed out more, and Mello and Near came in sight. They too had stripes of flower and batter on their faces. Near looked quite proud—completely different from his otherwise unfeeling expression. Mello more sad and bored, nipping off his chocolate bar.

"It's L's birthday today." Matt explained as he set down the camera and joined Near and Mello at the table.

"Not that's he's here anyways." Mello mumbled.

"And we didn't know what to give him." Matt continued undisturbed.

"He's not gonna come." Mello rolled his eyes.

"So, we baked him a cake!" Matt cheered. He ignored Mello who grumbled: "It's not like he's the one that's gonna eat it." And whispered to Near: "say your line now."

Near twirled a lock of white hair between his fingers, looking at the camera with his big innocent eyes.

"None-existing, future grandchildren: if you're ever at complete loss as to what you should give L: give him a strawberry shortcake. It's his favourite."

With that they smiled—except for Mello, who looked away indignantly—and the monitor went black again.

Watari came to stand behind L. He looked as if he wanted to say something, but images returned and he shut his mouth, as everyone stared at them intently, curious as to what came next.

"'Can't spell family without L', Mello's log," Mello was on his bed, eating chocolate, not looking at the camera. His room was black and he'd obviously shut the curtains. They could hardly even distinguish his form on the bed. One hand darted out to scratch at the skin below his navel, exposing his stomach. Light could be mistaken, but he thought L was holding his breath. The tape was probably a bit messed up, since this was an older Mello than the one that made the cake. The footage seemed to be extremely messed up, skipping between time as if it was nothing—not that this was possible, but, so Light thought, it had to be the case. "Matt said we should all make an entry in the diary today, so well, this is mine," he gave a deep sigh and chomped off more chocolate. "I have no fucking clue as to what to say—oh shite... I'm not supposed to swear... Matt believes it might infect the sanity of the none-existing grandchildren... such rubbish," he grumbled off to himself some more, then sat up straighter. "I suppose I should tell you more about L and shit like that... you know, he's gonna live forever and it'll spare you the trouble if you know how to handle the guy," Matsuda glanced at L quickly, then focused on the blonde boy again. "There's really not much to it... we don't see him all that much, but hey, he says he cares, so who am I to argue with the great L?" Mello's voice was drowned with sarcasm. "Always nice and innocent and oh, he really cares. Honestly. Fucking douche," Mello muttered angrily. Some more swears and he leaned closer to the camera, and now Light was positive L was holding his breath. The rosary shone in the red light of the recorder, and to everyone's surprise, there were tears in the blonde's eyes. He bit off a piece of chocolate from a barely visible bar. "There's just one thing worth knowing when it comes to him: never expect _anything_." With that, he shut off the camera and all went black one more.

This time everyone was too shocked to speak. It was quite clear to them that L knew these kids very well—but apparently something had gone wrong between him and the blonde that ate all the chocolate. They all wanted to know what, but L was too engrossed in the screen and the next set of footage to notice their questioning looks.

There were lots of kids in some backyard, but the camera was pointed at the raging, chocolate-consuming blonde, and the quiet, cute, fluff-ball. Light noted that they were younger again—yep, these tapes had been tampered with! Flipping through age like that!

They were on a resting chair, Mello rubbing sun lotion on the younger boy's nose, saying something about his very fair complexion, and how he'd burn without the lotion. Near commented that the lotion smelled and Mello asked bitterly if he wanted to look like a lobster. The voice they understood the best, was the one of the redhead, who was HANTEREN the camera.

"'Can't spell family without L', and it's summer," he zoomed in on the two boys in the chair, then went across the kids playing in the pool. "We're having a family moment, as you can see," he went back to his friends. Mello was just stripping off his clothes, revealing his black swim-trunks that rode low on his hips. Near pulled off his trousers carefully, but kept his shirt on, in fear of burning. "L should be here soon... though when he says 'soon', it could vary from one hour to one week to one month—no kidding."

Mello smiled at the camera—L was relieved, he didn't like seeing Mello unhappy. He was even more beautiful when he smiled.

"And when it's summer and L's coming, there's always at least one good side to the story!" Mello exclaimed happily, standing up and stretching. "We get to see him in just his swimsuit!" He winked naughtily at the redhead—evidently winking at the camera too, and headed to the pool.

Matt laughed (so did everyone at the headquarters except for L himself) and after Mello'd dived in, he returned his attention to Near.

"Any chance you're gonna give me a nice shot of your cool dive?" He questioned.

Near shook his head, staring off into the distance. The camera was put down, and Matt sat next to the younger boy.

"No worries éh," he said silently, as he could see Near was depressed. "L's gonna live forever."

"I know!" Near said defensibly. "What if he wants to live forever without us?" He then questioned in a voice just above a whisper.

"Rubbish!" Came a voice from the right—Mello had returned from his quick swim.

He came into the picture and shook his body and head about, dripping onto the other two boys.

"No one can live without us Near! We're amazing! He's our family. If he leaves us, it's his loss, and I kick him to death with a can full of panda-cookie-happiness!" He ruffled Near's hair sweetly, and Near actually smiled.

"Now, let's put off the sodding camera and go swim! I think it's time we teach Near how to dive like the pro's and pull off kids' undies without them realising!"

Matt grinned and Near's expression was albeit shocked. Mello stuck out his tongue at the camera, and shut it off.

They didn't even have time to breathe when another scene of pictures began.

There was water running, and a washbasin appeared on the monitor. The camera shifted to the shower, where they could see a shadow of someone behind the curtain.

"Mells, you almost done?" The redhead's voice echoed creepily against the white tiles of the bathroom.

"Yeah, yeah, keep your panties on!" The curtain shifted and everyone at headquarters gasped like one man—except for L; his eyes just widened.

Mello was extremely... naked. And barely a teenager, but apparently, besides his mind, his body matured faster than that of a normal kid too. He looked way older than he really was.

Mello's skin was glistering with droplets of water and his rosary hung slick against his chest. He pushed back some of his wet hair and turned towards Matt. His look of adequate calm and relaxation turned into one of shock and disbelieve.

"Fuck, Matt!" He scowled and the camera zoomed in on his face and chest, still revealing his lower stomach, and the little pencil-stripe hairs there.

"Don't fucking point that thing at me when I'm in the nude!" He pushed the lens away, but it returned immediately.

"But you're hot!" Matt protested.

Mello rolled his eyes and snapped away a towel, binding it around his body.

"You're an even bigger perv than L," Mello snarled, looking right into headquarters once more—as if he knew who was looking, but in real life he was trying to make eye-contact with Matt. "You should be proud Mattie. You're becoming more and more like him every day," then he winked and took another towel. "So why the fuck do you bug me while I'm in the shower?"

He started drying his hair and the camera neared in, filming his rosary up close.

"We're bored," came a voice from the door. The vision blurred and then got white. Then it zoomed out and focussed on Near, looking at Mello. "We thought you might want to continue with 'Can't spell family without L'."

"Sure," Mello came in view again, as he pushed a shirt over his damp shoulder. He then dropped his towel from around his waist, showing off his fair backside. Tugging up his skin-tight leather pants he turned around, staring at the camera again. "Jeez Matt, I know I'm incredibly hot, but you seriously have to erase the me being naked part."

"No, Mells," Matt whined. "I wanna keep it!"

"But Mattie," Mello wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. "You don't seriously want anyone else to see my beautiful naked body, right?"

"Well..." the redhead seemed to be thinking. "No, not really."

"Good." Mello blew a kiss at the camera, and reached out to shut it off.

Light blinked. So did all the rest. L was in his typical position, nibbling on his thumb. No new images came. The tape had come to an end. Light tried to figure out what L was thinking, but it proved to be impossible. He just sat there. Everyone stared at the black screen.

"Well..." Soichiro began nervously, breaking the silence. "That was... interesting."

L turned to Watari.

"Where did you get those boxes?" He questioned.

"Wammy's." Watari said, sitting down, still looking at the screen a little shocked.

L nodded and Light asked: "Who are those people Ryuuzaki? How do you know them?"

"That is not relevant," L said, and got out the tape. "I just do not understand why they made this tape."

"We should watch another one!" Matsuda cheered. "Maybe then we'll understand!"

He just really wanted to see more of the three kids—maybe get to know L better through them, and laugh some more at the funniness their actions ensued.

L shook his head, and simply got out his phone, typing a number and waiting for it to connect to the other's line. Light looked at the monitor, at L and back at the monitor. No way he was going to be able to work now; all these new mysteries being revealed—the tapes were bound to be stuck in his head for days.

L held the phone to his ear and said: "Hai, Rodger. I need to speak to Mello, if it is possible. He is ignoring his phone—probably busy causing general mayhem."

A voice spoke (something of 'going to go get him') and then things were quiet. Mogi and Matsuda exchanged looks. Soichiro looked questioning at his son, as if maybe he had some answers.

Then a hyper but cold voice could be heard through the phone: "This is Mello, wha' do you want?"

L seemed to think this through. Then said: "I have some tapes and I think they're yours."

Silence. Infinite silence. When Mello spoke again it was reasonably quiet, but they could still hear his every word: "L-kun? Why are you not calling me on my cell-phone? Is something wrong? You are okay, right?"

L's odd smile appeared on his face, as if hearing the other boy's worried voice made him happy—though, Light figured, it probably did.

"I am fine, please do not worry about me." L said, smile sounding through in his voice.

Light found it quite amazing. He'd never seen the detective actually happy, happy. Only oddly-smiling happy. Never the happy that could be noticed and detected from miles away. This was very new to him—and to the other people present in the room besides Watari.

"Oh," the boy sound obviously relieved. "That's good... so, then what's up? You barely ever call when you're off doing dangerous stuff," he laughed. "Or what, do you already miss me too much?"

"Well, I do miss you." L said without even as much as a pink stain on his cheeks. Would Light ever admit missing someone in public, he was sure he'd blush. How L could stay so unemotional, whilst admitting something like that, was unexplainable.

"You do!" Mello sounded very happy all a sudden. "Wauw!" L rolled his eyes. "You've never said that before, this is a break-through! It has to be! That, or you're dying. But you're not, so, break-through!"

"I can't see what you're so happy about, you little brat," L commented dryly. "Missing something isn't generally a nice feeling."

"Pff," Mello huffed. "It's only fair that you'd miss me, since I miss you too."

"Okay, okay," L gave in. "We'll just miss each other than?"

"Sounds good to me," Mello said, and they heard a thump on the background. L suddenly frowned, and Mello hissed, obviously trying to be quiet so they wouldn't hear: "Matt, shush, I'll be right there!" Then, on his more normal, yet concerned, tone: "Have you slept though? Because you sound tired."

"Can I remind you of the fact that I'm old enough to take care of myself? Yes, of course I've slept," he ignored Light's taunting look. "Have you?" There was a strange innuendo.

Mello caught it.

"L-kun," he started slowly, and everyone thought it was strange, because the blonde boy they'd seen was way too active, or extremely down—the redhead comforted him, he didn't appear to comfort others. He seemed a maniacal kid, not one to use a calm voice—on _L_, of all people! "We were..." but L interrupted him.

"I was actually busy. I just wanted to ask about the tapes."

"Hey, don't be that way!" Mello ranted. "Let me..."

But L interrupted again.

"The tapes. Are they yours?"

And Mello burst.

"Oh _fuck_ you! You can't bloody be that way to me! Call me back when you're in a better mood, and there aren't people listening to the conversation and you can just be yourself, arsehole!" Second of silence. "And I have no fucking idea what fucking tapes you're talking about!"

And then he hung up.

L put down his phone, and his hand reached for the mouse. In five seconds flat all the files on the Kira-case had been opened, and he was typing away. No one said anything, and although Light kept sending L curious glances, they continued working in silence.

**AN: well, that's chapter one, okay? So, let me know if it was okay, and I'll continue writing! Please review!**


	2. Where kissing isn’t a big deal—

Can't spell family without L: Part two: where kissing isn't a big deal—and neither is eating Yell-O by yourself.

**AN: for all of you who were waiting for this: thanks for the reviews, and sorry it took so long! Ages are messed up, they're probably OOC, and well... just read! **

It had been a few days since they'd watched the first tape, and the others were just lying there on L's desk

Even though Matsuda didn't know, L had noticed him staring at them for a very long time now, and quite frankly; it was getting on his nerves.

"Matsuda-san," he said suddenly and Matsuda jumped. Light looked up, and L sipped tea. "Can you tell me why you've been staring at the tapes for over an hour now?"

"I'm just curious as to what is on them." Matsuda explained.

Aizawa wanted to shake his head disapprovingly, but ended up nodding in agreement.

L looked at all the hopeful faces, even Light and Watari looked curious.

"Fine," he sighed and put in tape two. "We'll watch."

They were all close to cheering, but refrained from doing so, being certain L would disagree with such rash, and childish behaviour.

When the boys appeared, they were a bit older again—not the kids they were with the cake, or the swimming pool.

"I've decided that it's the most pointless thing we've ever done." Said Mello's voice from the dark. A light started burning, and Matt's face became visible—he'd lighted a cigarette.

Light didn't know how old he was, but he knew he was too young to be smoking.

The red light of the recorder gave the darkness a bloody glow, and it looked like a scene out of some horror movie.

"Since when do you care?" Matt asked.

They were discussing something, but everyone at headquarters was clueless as to _what_ exactly it was that they were discussing.

"I don't," the blonde mumbled. "I just wanted to point that out," a bed creaked and Mello extended from under his sheets. They could see him stretch in the faint light, and it was obvious that they'd been close to sleeping; Mello was only in his black boxers and a nightshirt—_seriously_, Light thought, _is everything this kid owns black_? When he passed the camera, the light reflected oddly against the beads of his rosary. "Scoop, will ya'?"

Mello pushed against Matt's legs and flopped down by his feet. He reached down into the dark and pulled out a bar of milk-chocolate, seemingly out of nowhere.

"Mells," Matt began, blue smoke emerging from his mouth. "What happens when we fall in love?"

Mello frowned, and a shadow fell over his face He nibbled from the chocolate.

"Buds before birds, Mattie," he leaned against the wall, tucking his feet under the blankets. "If we fall in love, we fall in love. Nothin' we can do about that."

"Pff," Matt grumbled. "I don't wanna fall in love. You're already more than I can handle."

Mello laughed.

"It don't really make a difference," he said wisely. "We're best friends forever, no matter what."

"Well, as long as your girl let's you bunk in my bed, I suppose I won't complain." The orange dot moved away and he flung his arm around Mello's lithe body, pulling him down next to him.

Mello's laugh ringed through the room again, and they saw his form snuggling closer to the redhead.

"And if your girl don't let me, let 'er now I'll kick her ass."

"Tss." The red dot moved closer to Mello's face—Matt had wrapped an arm around his shoulder.

He came closer so he could inhale and Mello scrunched his nose.

"You and your bloody cigarettes." Mello murmured.

"You and your bloody chocolate." Matt replied when the blonde took another bite.

"Chocolate's not a bad thing," Mello said know-it-all-ish. "I mean... I bet L would kiss me before he kisses you!"

L blinked. Matt snickered.

"Can you blame 'em, you probably consist solely out of chocolate! He'd want to _eat_ you—not snog you."

"Ha!" Mello pointed a finger at his face—which was hard because they were very close. "I bet you I can get him to snog me before you can!"

"Fine!" Matt pointed at the camera. "We'll put it on tape, so we can put it with 'Can't spell family without L'. I'll totally kick your butt."

"Na'ah! He wouldn't want to snog you! You taste like an ashtray!"

"No I don't!" Matt grumbled.

Then Mello kissed him quickly but softly.

"Okay..." Mello lay back down on his back. "So maybe you don't... but still."

Matt laughed and the orange dot of his cigarette disappeared. Everyone at headquarters was thoroughly confused. That had been a real-life kiss. Since when were they a couple? They couldn't be... they were friends. But... wasn't kissing something only lovers do?

They didn't seem to mind, because they just continued as if the blonde hadn't just touched the redhead's lips with his own.

"We should seriously put a rating on this thing," Matt joked. Their bodies were still glowing in the red of the camera. "Before we know it we'll be betting who's first to undress L and who's first to fu—" Mello slapped a hand across his mouth.

"Mattie, no matter how much I'd like to bet you that I can do _both_ of those things before you can; we really shouldn't," Mello turned around, crawling under the blankets. "Or he'll have to arrest himself for being a paedophile. And we can't have that éh."

Matt burst out into laughter again. Mello yawned.

Matsuda didn't know whether to laugh or to look shocked. Light's eyes were marbles. Everyone else was dumbfounded. Except for L; he had the weird smile plastered on his face.

"Okay, Mells," Matt got up and sat down before the camera. Solemnly he spoke into it: "tomorrow your butt is going to be kicked and L is totally snogging me before you." Then he shut it off.

Watari wanted to ask L if 'please, tell me they didn't!' But before he could utter a single syllable, L came into view. He looked the same, but he had to be younger—a couple of years or so.

The camera appeared to be placed in a living room, but L was—as always—eating cake. He sat with his knees up to his chest, his fork dangling between his fingers, and prodding into the cake happily.

Light really wanted to smile, because it was such a familiar view—he refrained.

Mello came into sight, he looked even better than usual. The tight leather was replaced by black, skinny jeans—there wasn't really a difference, but it looked different. His shirt was taut against his chest, and his rosary was firmly plastered to it.

He waved a kiss at the camera, and marched up to L, who looked up once, to acknowledge his presence, then went back to eating.

Light wanted to grin—once again, he refrained.

But Mello wasn't disappointed in the least, he was used to a silence L, if L had said 'Hi' or something, then he would've started worrying. But no, L appeared to be in as good a mood as always.

He pushed away the cake after L had flopped a piece into his mouth, and placed himself on the table, putting his socked feet on L's chair—against L's own bare ones.

L tipped his head to the side in a questioning motion, but Mello just smiled, and took the plate from behind him, offering it back to L. That had been L's main problem; not being able to consume cake. So now he contentedly took another piece. They sat there, and for a while the people at the other side of the screen just watched the blonde kid holding a plate, and L eating the cake. Then the cake was gone, and L stared sadly at the empty plate.

"I have chocolate if you want, L-san!" Mello exclaimed, angelic expression on his face.

L's eyes grew even bigger, and he asked hopefully: "Really? Where is it Mello-kun?"

And then Mello's lips were on L's.

Everyone gasped. L kept on smiling the weird smile.

Mello pulled back, smiling too.

"Well, do I not taste like chocolate?" He asked innocently. He got off the table, said: "thank you L-san!" And left a blinking L by himself.

Coming to the camera again, he winked, mouthed: "I kick _ass_ Mattie!" and shut it off.

The screen went black.

Everyone stayed quiet, but Watari, who seemed to have snapped out of the trance: "Those boys are always up to mischief. You should have told someone L-san. Roger would surely have punished Mello."

L turned to him.

"It's not right to punish courage. It should be encouraged. And if that means letting a thirteen-year-old kiss me, so be it," he looked up at the monitor again. "If I would have pushed him away, or if he would have been punished for his actions, I'm sure he wouldn't be the Mello we know today. And that would just be a shame."

"Hmm," Watari seemed to be thinking. "But he malfunctioned... in a way."

"If Mello malfunctioned, than so did I Watari-san," L noted strongly. "Than so did Near, and so did Matt."

Watari nodded and before something else could be said, the screen burned with images again.

This time, the camera was in a bedroom—but it wasn't one of the kids'. It was bigger and had a double-bed. Nonetheless, Mello was there, even though they could just barely see him sitting in the dark, on a sofa, legs pulled up to his chest. L came into the picture, sighing slightly.

"Stop dimming the light Mello," he said, illuminating the night lamp that stood on the table next to Mello's seat. "I have to be able to see you."

Now that the room was somewhat more lit, they could clearly see the bruises on the blonde's face. He was shivering too, and wet. Matsuda had to fight not to gasp—_poor kid_, he thought, okay, he didn't look like the nicest kid on earth, but for people to beat him up like that, Matsuda was sure it was quite unnecessary.

Monitor-L gently took Mello's chin in between his finger, dropping through his knees to examine it in the pale light.

"Why did you let those teenage delinquents beat you up like this?" L asked, putting some disinfectant alcohol on a soft cloth. "You're strong enough to take all three of them."

Mello stayed quiet for a while. He shivered some more, but L was focussing on the deep cut on his cheek.

"I can't beat people in the house of God," Mello whispered then, and bit his lip when the cut stung on impact. "It would not be right."

L sighed again. Light was quite surprised—L looked like a true big brother, or something.

"Mello, I respect your religion, and your faith. You know I do not support violence, but other people do not have the right to think they can misuse you in any way," Mello hung his head but L picked it up again, smiling oddly. "The next time someone wants to hurt you when you are in a place of God, contact me," he tucked some hair behind Mello's ear, and helped him to his feet. It appeared he had some trouble with standing. "I will come for you then."

Mello nodded faintly and L led him to the bed. He made sure the blonde chocoholic was comfortable against the pillows and left quickly, to return not long after with some tea and a towel. While the boy sipped the hot tea, L did his best to somewhat dry his wet hair—he managed, though the hair ended up looking quite ruffled. He helped Mello out of his wet clothes, tugging harshly at the pants until they fell in a heap on the floor, and gave him one of his own shirts.

"It's all I have." he explained, but all Mello did was smile gracefully. L tucked him in tight.

"Mello," L began again, after he'd put away the empty cup. "What is that thing anyways?" He pointed directly at the camera.

"Matt made it, he's quite inventive," Mello said pensively. "It follows me everywhere I go—well, almost everywhere—it doesn't leave the premises. It records the stuff I do. And this way he always knows where I am. He's creepy-stalkerish that way," Mello smiled at the memory of his redheaded best friend. "Seriously, I have trouble going to the loo, 'cause if I wouldn't kick it and stomp it, it'd follow me there too."

"Oh, and than Matt dares calling me a pervert?" L raised an eyebrow. "_He_ has devices filming your bathroom-activities."

Mello laughed a true, heartily laugh, and L stepped onto the bed, and then bend down to sit in his odd position next to Mello.

"Yes, but it's only because he knows how hot I am when I'm naked." Mello chuckled and L shook his head, rolling his eyes slightly.

"You should try to sleep Mello," L said, thumb to his lips. "If Watari finds out you stayed up this late, he'd be quite disappointed."

Mello nodded faintly, and snuggled deeper into the blankets. Then he realised where he was, and asked: "do you mind if I stay with you tonight?"

L just tucked him in deeper. He then shut off the light, but the camera filmed on, and they waited to see Mello fall asleep. Then there was grey snow, and the bedroom again—someone had cut a piece out of the film, and, by the looks of a sleeping (yes SLEEPING!) L and Mello, it were the hours they had spent in dreamland that were cut out.

Light had seen L sleep—not a lot, but since they had been chained together, he'd seen him sleep—but he could not get over the fact that L looked far more at ease sleeping next to the small boy than he'd ever been sleeping in the bed next to Light's. And Light was sure it had nothing to do with the fact that L believed him to be a mass-murderer.

Mello lazily moved closer to the man's body, the top of their heads meeting, blonde mingling with charcoal-black. Then suddenly they heard a door opening, and had they been paying attention to their surroundings, they would've noticed the blush evident on Watari's cheeks.

"Roger is wondering if you're coming down for breakfast soon," a younger Watari entered the scene, stepping into the pool of blood red light coming from the camera, easily finding his way over to the window. He opened a curtain. "And have you seen Mello anywhere?" He asked, opening the next. "Because he isn't anywhere to be found and Matt knows but won't..." he stopped talking as he saw the men sleeping.

L opened his eyes, blinking once, twice. Mello just grumbled and turned around in his sleep. Watari sat down his tray with tea on the table and quirked a questioning eyebrow—not in a disapproving manner, merely surprised.

"He got kicked by some ignorant teenagers in church," L explained, pushing away the blankets so he could get up. He was still wearing his clothes from the other day, and walked over to a drawer. "I found him outside the gates, he didn't want to come inside."

"Why did he let them hit him like that?" Watari asked, concerned about the sleeping form.

He came a little closer, to check out the cuts and bruises.

"He says he couldn't hit them when in the house of God." L said, and pulled off his white t-shirt.

He was about to throw it on the floor, but Watari grabbed it instead, waiting for L to hand over his jeans too. He then waited patiently for L to put on a clean, oversized shirt, and strip his boxers off. Really, with the too big shirt there wasn't much visible anyways. Watari picked up some stray socks here and there, and Mello's tight pants and waistcoat, and left again.

L walked back to the bed, where Mello grumbled something incoherent in his sleep. He sighed, and the screen messed up again, going grey.

It was only Mello's back that showed on the camera, and someone standing out of the frame was talking.

"...well, you three should just help me find him." An older man—about young-Watari's age—said.

"Why us?" The blonde asked, still only showing his back.

"Because you're smartest. And you barely ever go out—you know the good hiding places. Come on, of you go!"

Near passed behind Mello, and Light could only deduct that it was Matt's Mello-tracing-camera that was filming the whole scene. Another set of footsteps, and the redhead then came standing in front of Mello, so they could see his face.

"The Jell-O's missing, and so is L," he grumbled. "This is too weird for words."

"Hey Mattie," Mello bumped his arm against Matt's, and Light was sure he was grinning that diabolical grin of his. "First one to find the Jell-O and eat from it wins!"

And he ran off, the camera turning and following the running boy. This part of the tape was worse filmed than all the others, because the blonde refused to halt anywhere, and the camera just followed him at top speed. They could still deduct rooms full of children and a dinning room, until at last Mello halted, and they all entered... the kitchen.

He opened cupboards and closets, until an odd sound emerged from one. Mello stood completely still. The door of a cupboard moved. Everyone held their breath as Mello grabbed a pan and slowly stalked closer. With one quick tug he opened the cupboard, pan at the ready, to reveal... a Jell-O eating L.

The camera stopped too, again filming Mello's back. Cupboard-L blinked. Mello bend through his legs and crawled into the cupboard next to L. He looked at the small boy with curious, guilty eyes. Mello looked in shock.

"You ate the whole Christmas Jell-O... by yourself?"

"Well," L began, looking at the bowl, spooning some remnants up. "There's a bit left. You can have some if you want," he offered the Jell-O to Mello. "If you promise not to tell I was the one who ate it."

Mello seemed to doubt, taking the spoon into his mouth. L smiled idly and returned the empty spoon to the Jell-O.

"If anyone finds out you ate the whole thing by yourself, there's about seventy kids that are going to want to brutally murder you." Mello stated matter-of-factly, opening his mouth for more Jell-O.

L reluctantly gave him the next spoonful. He didn't mind sharing that much, but it was _really_ nice Jell-O.

"I am fully aware of that fact." L said.

Mello smiled.

"Good," while L took some more Jell-O, Mello dipped his finger in, and crawled back out. "Oh, and just so you know; I'm one of the few kids that will _not_ brutally murder you."

He gave a wink, and closed the cupboard again. The screen got grey, and then black. Everyone waited for new images to come—anything to make it clearer, to get to know them better, to learn more about L—but none came.

L picked up his phone once more, dialling the same number he'd dialled days ago—Light turned to him in surprise. This time the boy at the other end picked up his phone, so L didn't need to call Roger.

"Hi, can you just give me one second," the boy said, and a door closed. "'m sorry, who is this please?"

L paused, then said: "Mello, I wanted to recheck about the tapes. They're very distracting," he glanced at Matsuda who blushed and then at Light. "I really think they might be yours."

"Why do you always call me if you want to check stuff?" Mello sounded hurt, and a soft 'thump' was audible. "Why can't you just once call me because you just want to talk?"

"Because 'just wanting to talk' isn't worth risking people's life." L commented, his thumb to his mouth.

"It is when it's with you," there was an awkward silence and just as L was about to say something, Mello said: "You should maybe check with Matt... or, I'll check with Matt. Because it's not really my habit to put stuff on camera... Matt's the only one that actually owns recorders."

"Thank you Mello," L pulled his knees even closer to his chest, pushing a button on his computer. "I'll be back soon."

"Don't say that L," Mello definitely sounded sad. "Last time you said you were going to be back soon, you stayed away for another six months. It's okay though, I understand. You're justice."

"Justice will prevail." L used his over-used sentence as if that would make it all better—on the other side of the phone Mello decided that although it didn't, it was nice of L to try. He wouldn't try for just anyone, mind you.

"Indeed it will," he said, smiling. Then someone's angry voice called for the blonde boy, and L's eyes widened a bit. "It was really nice hearing your voice again," Mello said, and a door opened again. "But Roger's yelling, and I'm sure he's looking for me, since I'm the one that took his cane," L smiled too. "He's been in a foul mood for days—I guess Watari stopped checking in and it's bursting his bubbles," L glanced over at Watari, who had the decency to blush. "So I'll ask Matt if he knows something about tapes, and I'll... I'll find a way to contact you."

"Okay, thank you." L pushed more buttons to call back the Kira-files.

"Hey... all the guys there are Japanese, right?" Mello seemed to doubt. "So... ik hou van jou**(1)**?"

L's smile grew and Watari stared in shock. No one else had a clue of what the blonde just said.

"Ik hou ook van jou.**(2)**" With that L hung up.

Watari opened his mouth to give L a piece of his mind, but L turned his chair and said: "no comment or I'll have to call Roger to see what that's all about."

Watari's mouth closed again and he slumped back on the couch. Matsuda was terribly disappointed. Not only did he not know what the hell L and Mello had said to each other, he also didn't know anything more about 'Can't spell family without L' and a lot more mysteries had been half-revealed. He gave a sad sigh. Well, as long as L didn't expect him to do his best work, he would be fine. Maybe he could persuade L into lending him the tapes once—that might clear his mind.

But really, no one was as curious as to what was on the tape as L—he just hid it well.

**AN: (1) I love you in Dutch, because Mello figures the people at Headquarters don't speak Dutch, (2) I love you too in Dutch.**

**If you read it and want me to continue, or if you want to flame me or just tell me what you thought: please review! Will give imaginary hugs, even to the flamers!**


	3. Wherein we see: Math and Men in the sun

Can't spell family without L: Part three: wherein we see: Math and Men in the sun.

"It's a deduction of two intercellular products of which one has a quantity of zero, and the other equals anything between Pi and minus five," Near's little head bobbed and shook. He gummed something out, and wrote a number down. "Or between Pi and minus four."

Mello grunted and pointed at something on Near's paper.

"Minus three, smart-ass. It's minus four when unknown quantity X is between zero and one hundred."

"Oh, right." Near gummed some more and Matt appeared, seemingly out of nowhere, goggles in front of his eyes and indulged in some Mario game.

Matt flopped down on a chair next to Mello's and continued playing.

"But if the construction is based on the law of symmetrical numbers minus their opposites, then the left one should have a bigger base—or a different headcount."

"You could also just add up plus two to the right one, and multiply it with five." Mello reasoned.

Matt frowned. So did everyone at headquarters—for the six hundredth time in five minutes flat. Well, except for L. And Watari—but that was because he was off in the kitchen making tea.

"But than if I get the exact multiplication of the headcount and the base, or of the deduction of the intercellular products, it shouldn't result in a negative quantity—it should be somewhere between at least..." Near started counting on his fingers, but Mello beat him.

"Yeah, yeah, a product between one and two hundred thirty six. I know, but then..."

This time Matt interfered.

"Guys, you're freaking me out. Stop doing the math like it's actually _fun_, because it ain't." Near looked rather insulted at the comment.

Mello grinned, and catapulted Near's rubber away. Near sighed and ducked under the table to get it.

"You're absolutely right Mattie, what is it you need us for?"

Matt pointed at the camera.

"Is it not obvious?" He asked, and shut off the PSP. "L is coming today. We should film all the kids going crazy at his arrival."

Light looked at Mello for a second—this was a recent image, he could tell. The boy looked older. So maybe not _recent_, recent. But he couldn't be younger than thirteen.

Mello nodded, smirking.

"We should do that. Our none-existing grandchildren will love _it_." Mello took a bite from his chocolate bar, leaning back in the old wooden chair.

Near's head appeared again and he sat down, frowning at Mello's words.

"Why do you keep saying that Mello?" He questioned. "I find it rather disturbing that you believe we'll never have any grandchildren."

Mello grinned, and Matt quirked his eyebrows, wondering what would come next.

"Well Near ma' boy," Mello said, sounding very western-ish. "I don't know 'bout you, but I plan on being very gay for the rest of my life," Matt laughed and Mello winked very sexily at him. "So no children for me. And as you must know, with all that wisdom of yours; no children equals no grandchildren."

Near shook his head lightly, a smile playing in the corner of his lips.

"And what about you, Matt? Don't you want children?" He asked politely.

"Mattie can't have babies dammit!" Mello pulled him closer, wrapping his arms around his shoulder. He liked playing the jealous boyfriend—Near always bought the act. "He's mine! He's my runner-up-boy Near!" At this Near frowned. "If no man wants me, Matt'll just have to take me!"

"Take you?" Matt smiled at his best friend's slip of the tongue. "I'd like that."

Mello pushed him away, smacking his shoulder.

"Oh you know what I mean, you perv. You're my bitch; no way we're suddenly trading places."

"Oh God," Near muttered, hanging his head. "I really didn't need to know who tops in your relationship."

At this both Matt and Mello starting laughing. Everyone at headquarters just looked rather shocked.

"We were joshing and you know it!" Matt smiled, getting from his chair.

Mello got up too. Near put his things away, and followed.

"We're best friends," Mello said, throwing an arm around the small boy. "It would be a waste if we'd let that go, simply because we're two horny teenagers working it out on each other."

Near frowned once more—this wasn't his type of conversation. He didn't like discussing love or sex, or both at the same time. Though Mello and Matt had always intrigued him—their relationship that is.

"So you aren't lovers?" He asked.

Mello shook his head, Matt pecked his cheek and said: "Hell no. He kisses me to prove I taste like an ashtray and I kiss him to convince him that I don't—that's where it ends."

Matt disappeared and seconds later the camera moved. It followed the two boys out of what seemed to be a library. Mello still had an arm around the pale boy, and Matt jogged so he could film their faces again.

"So, back to important things: L's coming!" He added, whispering: "This is where you both cheer."

They smiled and Mello rolled his eyes.

"He's not dead," Mello sneered. "And it's not like he did something stupid—he's _L_ for God's sake. He'd probably become and anti-cake-freak before he did something stupid."

Near nodded in agreement.

"Though it is rather exciting to see him after all this time," he added. "He _is_ nice to talk to."

"He's a raven-head that's addicted to sugar. You should be afraid he's gonna eat you alive, since you look like a cupcake." Mello said bitterly and Matt sniggered.

"You look like liquorish—I don't see him trying to eat you."

"He doesn't _like_ liquorish. Though I'm sure he'd eat me before he eats you," Mello had the dangerous glint in his eyes again—the same one he'd gotten when he and Matt had bet who could first kiss L. "I'm far more sugary."

"Oh please, you're sour." Near commented.

"I am not!" Mello protested. "I'm a very sweet person."

Matt's laughter grew and Near said: "Believe whatever you want to, but I'm not a cupcake and L isn't a cannibal, so this conversation had no use whatsoever."

"You know," Mello said, and reached out to the camera. "He's ri—" and it shut off.

Matsuda smiled lightly—he still didn't know what the tapes were for, but he'd been forced to go two days without seeing the kids bicker and it had been eating him up inside. Luckily they'd managed to persuade L into watching another tape. Oh yes, Matsuda was a very happy person.

The colours on screen changed, and two legs and a back appeared. A door was visible too, and by the look of the black pyjamas the person was wearing, Light could only decide that Matt's Mello-stalking camera had filmed this particular scene.

The door was pushed open, and they entered a bedroom—L's bedroom. Mello's fist appeared and he hit the camera-device-thing—they had no idea what the stalker-camera looked like, but it halted when you hit it, so much was sure. He continued walking and the camera stayed put, letting them get a better view of Mello. He was at least thirteen, like he'd been on the previous footage, and was again wearing black. He'd been off to bed—or someone had made him change into his pyjamas. A bit of his stomach was showing, as if his shirt was too small, though it seemed to fit fine everywhere else.

L was on his bed, typing once more, but one of his arms was in a bandage, and he was sitting peculiarly straight. Mello stalked closer to the bed, but L didn't look up until the blonde boy sat down at the foot of his bed and started ranting: "are you insane!" he began, clearly pissed off. "How could you've gotten yourself hurt like that?" L opened his mouth but Mello waved his hand to silence him. "You have to be out of your _mind_ to actually let people shoot you!" He furiously continued waving his hands all about and L blinked. Light blinked too. "You could've been killed and then—" but L interrupted him.

"Mello, I am fine." He said matter-of-factly.

"You can barely move your arm and you got shot _two_ times in the chest," Mello grumbled. "I don't call that being '_fine_'."

L sighed lightly and put his computer down on the night table. He beckoned for Mello to come sit next to him, and then wrapped his right arm—the good one—around Mello's shoulder in a comforting manner. The younger boy huffed.

"Do not worry Mello. I am fine." He repeated his earlier statement.

"But if you would've—" Mello began sadly.

"But I _didn't_. There's always a possibility that I end up dead Mello," L said—a bit harshly, as if he didn't want to hear those words, but knew they had to be said. "You're old enough to know that the 'L lives forever' is a lie. I am justice, but that does not make me immortal."

"I know," Mello sulked and put his head against L's shoulder. "It still doesn't mean you have to nearly die on me, and call and say nothing's happened, and then waltz in like you're absolutely fine."

"You're right," L nodded. "I should have told you I was shot. Would that make it better?"

Mello scowled. Matsuda smiled. What and L-ish thing to say—never mind the fact that it was indeed _L_ saying it, so Matsuda's thought was stupid and such. It was Matsuda—he has the right to think stupid things. Light frowned and Matsuda kept on smiling, waiting for the conversation to continue.

"It wouldn't—but it would only be fair," Mello pecked his cheek and said, happier then before: "If you promise to tell me when you're hurt, I promise not to clog up all the blankets!"

L rolled his eyes, but then put his thumb to his lips, as if considering it. Then: "It's a deal." And they shook hands.

Mello grinned widely, and pulled out a bar of chocolate from his pj pocket. He bit off a piece, and L eyed it jealously.

"What?" Mello asked sincerely.

"Watari says that now that my torso's in a bandage I shouldn't eat pie at night anymore," he hung his head. "And I wouldn't listen to him, but every time I come close to the kitchen he starts hitting me with his cane."

Mello doubled up laughing, then snorted, then tried to straighten his back and look sympathetic. Then he broke off a piece of his bar.

"Here. He'll never know." Mello winked and L looked up.

His eyes grew wide at the sight of the chocolate, and then—

Everything went black and the main screen appeared again. Everyone frowned and looked confused. Light freaked and L started pushing buttons.

"What happened?" Matsuda squealed—this would be denied! "Did the tape end?"

"No, someone's trying to—" But L was broken short when a high-pitched voice cheerfully announced: "You've got Mello-message! Please forgive us for the interruption!" and a window opened.

"Me...-mello-message?" Light stuttered.

Indeed. The window showed a webcam view of a room they'd been in before—Mello and Matt's bedroom. The blonde was bustling about lightly, not even being clothed. He was only wearing a towel and his rosary, and was looking for his t-shirt. Chocolate was dangling from his mouth, nearly falling to the ground. His lips were a bit smudged with the brown sweet.

He was definitely older now. Had to be sixteen, at the _least_, Light decided. His body was almost fully grown, and if he paid close attention—which he _wasn't_ doing, of course—he could see the little pencil stripe hairs on his lower stomach when he turned their way. Without looking up he said: "Hi! Give me one second, I need clothes."

L blinked. Light whispered: "can he see us."

"Yeah," Mello said. "Hear you too—the security's not easy to hack, seriously. You can be happy our hacker is the best, otherwise you'd be in trouble." Still looking for something he could wear.

By now he was on his knees searching under his bed. The bedroom door opened suddenly, and in came a redhead, about Mello's age. They knew it was Matt, not only because he pretty much looked the same, but also because of the PSP in his hands and the goggles on his head. And because, let's face it, they'd seen the kid a lot by now—it'd be ridiculous if they _didn't_ recognise him.

"Hey Mells, the dude is complaining about the arrangement, he says we—" he halted when he couldn't see his blonde friend. "Mells?"

"Under the bed," Mello said, now only his feet sticking out. "I can't find my bloody clothes!"

"Most of your stuff is in Near's room Mells." Matt noted.

"But there has to be some sort of clothing here! It can't all be gone and—" he came back from under the mattress, hair a little ruffled. Everyone stared at the two intently. L had his thumb to his lips again. "Wait, why are they in Near's room?"

"You remember when I 'accidently' pulled away your towel three days ago, and you went berserk because you were in a bad mood and didn't want to be touched and called me a perv and moved your clothes?" Matt didn't look up from the screen.

Mello seemed to be thinking.

"Oh," he then said, and held out his hand to Matt. "I remember. Now give me your shirt. And then leave."

Matt frowned, but was still focussing on his game.

"Why would I do that?"

"I need clothes!" Mello yelled.

"You're great like this."

"I can't let people I don't know see me half-naked Matt, you stupid-ass bitch!"

Matt grumbled something incoherently and paused his game. He then proceeded in taking off his shirt. Mello pulled it over his shoulders, and charismatically wriggled his hips until the towel dropped—Matt's shirt was way too big for him, and it barely reached his knees. He pushed Matt out his door, without much protest, since Matt was back to being indulged in the game, and flopped down in front of his computer. He took the chocolate in his hand.

"Okay, sorry for that, the thing was starting but it took ages, so I thought I'd take a shower and—" he stopped and stared into the lens. L and Light frowned. "Is it just me or are all those people staring at me?"

L turned around. Then turned back to Mello.

"It is not just you; they are all staring at you."

"Ah. They have been this whole time?"

L nodded.

"So the stealing Matt's shirt didn't really have a purpose?"

L shook his head. Mello coughed.

"Let's pretend that didn't happen then—" he stared back into headquarters again. "Who are all those people?"

"They're my team." L said, smiling.

Everyone gave a polite nod—except for Matsuda, he waved, naturally. Mello grinned.

"Amazing. How fairly interesting this all is," he leaned back in the chair, pulling his legs to his chest, so they could see his coppery skin. "I wanted to tell you that Matt has no clue what those tapes are."

L shrugged.

"You could not have called?"

"I wanted to see you," Mello raised an eyebrow. "Is that a crime?"

"No, but hacking is." L pointed out.

"Tss, I can hack into your computer whenever I want to," Mello said childishly, pointing a finger. "What's mine is yours, and what's yours is mine," he bit off a chunk. "And you shouldn't make it accessible, if you don't want me to hack it."

"You have the world's best hacker on your team," L pointed out, biting his thumb an gesturing at Mello, trying to draw attention to the shirt he was wearing and meaning to make clear he meant Matt. "So we'll just say it's even and forget about your illegal activities."

At this point Watari entered the room with Misa Misa, and Mello's smile broadened.

"Watari-san!" Mello cheered, waving at the old man, who nearly died of a heart-attack. Misa stared in shock at the blonde on the monitor—who was way hotter than she was, and it made her jealous. "I'm giving imaginary hugs! Feel them!" Mello added, sounded rather threatening.

Light shrugged. Mello fixed his stare on him.

"Is there a problem Yagami?" He asked bitterly—he didn't like to be mocked with the fact that he loved the old man to pieces. "You do realise your name spells 'I'm a gay' backwards, right? So I don't think you have the right to shrug at my display of adoration for the incredible Watari." Yes, he knew he'd made it sound as if Watari was a superhero, but he couldn't be damned.

Misa got red in the face and ran over to Light, trying to hug him from behind, but he pushed her off.

"I apologise," he bend his head. "I didn't mean to insult you."

"Pff," Mello huffed, and turned in his chair. "No prob. But the name thing isn't a lie you know, though I'm sure it's not a fact," he then focussed on L, ignoring the raging Misa Misa. "I'm happy to see you are still breathing."

"Likewise." L smiled the creepy smile.

"You do look tired though," Mello sounded concerned now, though his face didn't show much emotion. "How long has it been since you slept?"

"Not long." L said, lied.

"Liar." Mello shook his head.

Light found it quite amazing that Mello could tell. He was never sure if L was lying or not.

"A couple of days." L admitted.

Mello rolled his eyes.

"Well, I suppose it doesn't really make a difference. It's not like I can make you, if not even Watari's cane can." He got a twinkle in his eye at the last statement.

Watari came standing behind L, looking at Mello with piercing eyes.

"About that," he said. "Mello, have you by any chance, seen my cane?"

Mello hooted, then wheezed out: "No, absolutely not."

L smiled and Mello winked.

"I took it." He confessed seconds later.

"I thought so."

"We'll trade," Mello's voice turned more serious. "I will return your cane—completely intact, if you return L—completely intact," he pointed a warning finger at Watari. "Which means that I don't want any limbs missing or an ear gone looking."

L eyes grew a bit wider. Matsuda and the others gasped—though tried to hide it. They succeeded.

"Would you not accept me if I had less limbs." He asked, dumbfounded by Mello's brutality.

Light had to hide a snicker again. L was so innocent at times—it was too amusing.

"Of course I would," Mello waved his hand about. "As long as you're not missing... wait, can't say that, we're in decent crowd..." he trailed off for a second, and Matsuda's eyes grew. _He couldn't mean..._ "Let's just put it this way. If he's missing any pieces, the cane misses pieces. And not because I only like you when you're intact—I'd like you all the same with less stuff," Mello smiled sweetly. "But because it would be Watari's fault that you're missing any."

"Fine," Watari said. He had no problem with this sort of deals—L would be fine. He was L, for God's sake. "Let's shake imaginary hands."

"Done," Mello grinned. "Now, I have to go, before Roger starts complaining about me not getting fresh air," he bit a bit of his chocolate. "I don't mind him ranting usually, but seriously, Watari, I don't know what you did but he's acting like a PMSing bitch—" a pink flush appeared on Watari's face. "And if there's one thing worse than a PMSing bitch, it's a grown man acting like one!" He stretched lazily, gave a little wave, and added, looking L straight in the eye: "Jeg elsker dig1."

L's smile brightened, and Light really wondered what the boy had said. L repeated the blonde's words, and the window closed.

It took the computer half a second to go back to the tape—that had been playing all the while, so they ended up in the middle of a sea-scene.

"... burn and then you won't be sexy for when you capture Kira." This part of the tape was obviously very recent—Mello looked the same as he had looked seconds ago, and so did Matt. They were also talking about the Kira-case, and L was there, so the tape couldn't be older than a year.

L was on a towel, wearing white swim trunks, matching his pale skin. Mello was seated in front of him, ostensibly trying to get L to put on some sun-lotion, wearing black swim trunks and his rosary. Matt was sunbathing on a towel next to theirs, his swim trunks were multicoloured, and he yawned, goggles in place. Near was sitting under an umbrella next to Matt, still wearing the white shirt he always wore, and white swim trunks.

"It smells." L said.

"Yeah, yeah," Mello rolled his eyes. "I've been told. Come on."

He squirted some of the thick liquid on his hand, and reached out his hand to L's chest, frowning at the given task. Matt hummed a tuneless song and Near continued staring in the distance. Mello's hands trailed over L's shoulders and his collarbone, going down in circling motions, until they reached his bellybutton, and then rubbed low against the waistband of L's swimwear.

Light's eyes widened considerably, and a lot of people gasped. L just watched monitor-L look at Mello's face as he continued covering L with lotion. He was obviously not minding the touch whatsoever, it didn't shock him either—he looked as if Mello rubbed lotion so close to his intimates on a daily basis, which Light hoped he didn't.

Mello moved his hands away, and crawled around L like a big cat, to start on his back. Matt looked up, smirked, and pulled Mello's leg and—SQUISH!

"IEK!" Mello squealed and Headquarters didn't know whether to laugh or be shocked—for the thousandth time.

Monitor-L blinked sheepishly and Matt laughed his ass off, even Near couldn't hide his snickers. Being the insane man Matt was, he'd decided it would be nice to make Mello trip—hence the pulling on Mello's leg. But because Mello was just turning around, had bumped into L, sitting as he always sat, and their bodies had collided with a great squishy sound—since they were both slick with suntan lotion. Light did not find it amusing.

Mello looked up at L who stared down, blinking twice. His hands were on each sides of L's hips, clamping onto him as he tried to get up, kicking sand all around in the progress. His face was a bit red and L smiled and helped him get off. Matt chuckled and Mello scowled, then reached over to his bag and pulled out a bag, pointing it at the redhead's face. In seconds the redhead had pulled a gun out himself and they were screaming at each other. L and Near sighed.

"WHAT YOU DO THAT FOR YOU FUCKING SHITFACE, YOU—"

"YOU SHOULDN'T BE PISSED! IT'S NOT LIKE YOU HAVEN'T BEEN PRESSED AGAINST HIM BEFO—"

"THAT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS YOU STUPID SLUT! I'M GONNA—"

"BEATS BEING A COKED-UP BITCH—"

"OH I'M THE BITCH? THIS COMING FROM THE MAN THAT'LL TAKE ABOUT ANYTHING IN HIS MOUTH, YOU—"

"SAYS THE PUSSY WITH THE GIRLY CHOCOLATE-FETISH!—"

"DON'T CALL ME A GIRL! AND IT'S NOT A FETISH! IT'S SWEET!"

"NICE COMBACK! YOU GO _GIRL_!"

"SHUT UP WANKER BEFORE I BLOW YOUR BLOODY BRAINS OUT AND—"

"WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I WON'T BEAT YOU TO IT, BARBIE?"

Two clicks of the emergencies being unlocked were heard.

"YOU DON'T HAVE THE GUTS YOU WHORE!"

"TRY ME!"

"WHAT DO YOU THINK I'VE BEEN DOING FOR THE LAST TEN MINUTES!"

"EAT SHIT!"

"DIE PIECE OF CRAP! SEE YOU IN HE—"

With one swift movement L grabbed both of their guns and threw them in the sand. Mello and Matt's eyes widened, and they dived after them, trying to safe their beloved weapons.

"DON'T DO THAT!" Matt yelled, getting out the gun.

Mello dug his own out too, shaking it. Sand emerged.

"Man!" Matt petted the device lovingly, brushing off some sand. "You're insane L, don't do that," he glared accusingly at the man. "Now I have to clean it and..." he continued muttering.

Mello glared at Matt while getting up. He brushed himself clean, the sand sticking against his skin.

"Don't call him insane; he saved your life Mattie-boy."

Matt let it pass and got up too, flopping down next to Near. Mello sat down behind L, squirting lotion on his hand.

"L seriously sucks dude." Matt said, staring sadly at the sand-filled barrel, not even caring that the man in question was right there.

"Yeah, I know." Mello smiled dreamily, a distant glint in his eyes.

He continued covering L's back. L rolled his eyes again, and Near got red. Matt frowned.

"Mells, seriously, that was like... no pun intended."

Mello grinned and dropped himself down onto his belly, turning and closing his eyes, saying: "I know Mattie, I just couldn't resist." And poking L's side with his naked foot.

And then everything went black.

Matsuda opened his mouth to ask L something—he didn't know how to phrase his question or if he'd like the answer, but apparently the tape had ended and there were so many things still left to discover!

Before he could say anything though, L said: "I think we relaxed enough for today. Let's go back to work."

And all they could do was agree.

**AN: 1 I love you, in Danish.**

**SOOOO... how was that for you guys? Was it okay? Let me know, because I'm not writing another word until a get a good word about this--I'm not too sure it's good. So, yeah... let me know!**

**Sorry if they were OOC, and the Mello and Matt madness... well, what can I say, it's Mello and Matt, right? **

**Love! Crazy4Moony**


	4. Where they watch and L doesn’t know—

Can't spell family without L: Part four: Where they watch and L doesn't know—if he would've, he would've pressed 'off' ages ago.

"Matsuda, what do you think you're doing?" Light frowned and Matsuda straightened his back, eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights.

"I was..." He stared at Light and then flopped down in the chair, giving up on his fake-innocence. Everyone focused their attention on Light and Matsuda. L wasn't there, and Matsuda had been creeping around Light and L's desk for a while—silly him, as if Light wouldn't have noticed. "Maybe we... could watch a tape?" He asked, sighing deeply.

Light frowned.

"I'm not sure that is such a good idea, L is still in bed, for once actually sleeping," Light emphasised the point, because L really hadn't slept in days—just dozed off for ten minutes this one time, but that didn't count. "It wouldn't do to wake him."

"I'm not saying we should wake him." Matsuda insisted.

Aizawa nodded, saying: "we could watch them without L."

Light looked at Watari, who shrugged his shoulders, as if to say: "I won't tell, go ahead."

He sighed and reached for a tape—not noticing this was one that didn't have a number on it, and therefore did not belong to the 'Can't spell family without L' collection.

"Fine, we'll watch _one_." Matsuda cheered and everyone gathered round behind their chairs, as Light put the tape into the recorder.

He pressed play. Images appeared nano-seconds later. Everyone gasped like one person.

"That one is definitely the biggest." Monitor-L said, undisturbed by the stunned people at headquarters.

The image was filmed by Matt's Mello-tracing-camera—L was in bed, sitting up straight, thumb to his lips and wrapped in a blanket. He was pointing at a freckle on the body of a very _naked_ and disturbingly _Mello-like_ body. The body was on its stomach, showing off a tan ass, head in his arms. He turned around, facing L, and now they were one hundred percent sure it was the Mello-stalking camera, since the body _did indeed_ belong to Mello.

"It took you half an hour to decide which freckle was the biggest?" Mello clacked his tongue playfully. "What a waste of time."

"It's not like we were doing anything." L commented.

Mello raised a suggestive eyebrow, smirk in place. He cocked his head a bit.

"It's not my fault you have to be so bloody exhausting," he lifted a hand and pulled L down by his chin, making him tip over onto his knees. "But _fine_, if you insist, I'm ready for round two." And they kissed.

The screen went black.

Two pair of feet appeared from under a toilet booth. The door opened and Mello and L sprang apart. They both turned to the camera, eyes wide. L suddenly glared when he realised who—well, _what_ to be exact—had disturbed their little rendez-vous.

"Since when is it able to _open_ stuff?" He asked maliciously.

"Oh, Matt made it do all this awesome things, like..." Mello was cut off when L growled: "Not interested." Started snogging the boy again, and kicked the camera so it toppled over.

Light blinked twice in disbelief. Matsuda's mouth was wide-open. Watari looked rather pale. The others just stood there.

New footage started playing.

Mello was throwing popcorn at the camera—he looked about sixteen, and obviously bored, if he was willing to give his robotic stalker some attention. He was sitting in a hallway, back against the wall and completely outstretched, bar of chocolate in one hand, bag of popcorn resting in his lap. He sighed deeply and threw some more popcorn. They heard footsteps approach and Mello looked up hopefully—only to look disappointed seconds later.

"Hey, Mells, what 'you doing?" Matt's voice came.

"Waiting, of course," Mello rolled his eyes. "What are _you_ doing here?"

"I saw you sitting depressed-like in front of the camera," Matt flopped down next to his best friend, feet next to Mello's torso, and put a comforting hand on Mello's leg. He playfully poked Mello in the side with his foot, a way of saying hello. "And decided to come check it out. So what're you waiting for?"

"That L-bastard, naturally," Mello grumbled. "But he's late, as always."

"Well," Matt took some popcorn, chewing thoughtfully. "He was off doing dangerous stuff; he's never punctual when he's doing that."

"I know," Mello sneered, insulted that Matt tried to lecture him about L. "But you'd think that maybe, for once, he'd try being on time. He hasn't been here for six fucking months! I need sex, dammit."

Matt laughed, and tugged Mello with his foot again.

"You're a horny bastard Mells. But I'll wait with you, 'kay," Matt grinned. "If only to see the look on your face when you realise his elbow got dislocated and two ribs are broken, so he won't be able to bend correctly and do that thing with his mouth you like so much."

Mello dropped his chocolate in shock.

"HE WHAT—!"

And the screen went black again.

If Matsuda wasn't in so much shock he would've chuckled—most of them would have. But it happened to be more than they could comprehend, so the room stayed idly quiet until the next scene came.

"Give it to me!" Mello ranted—as a twelve-year-old, at the most.

"No!" L chirped childishly, pulling back the aeroplane.

"Give it!" Mello pulled too.

"No!"

"But you're not a kid!" Mello argued, pulling harder.

"I don't care, I want it!" L finally managed to take it from the blonde's nubby hands, and stuck out his tongue, holding the plastic toy above his head.

Mello frowned and started jumping up and down, reaching up, but L was still taller than him. He bumped and pulled and tugged and eventually... fell?

L looked up sheepishly at the blonde boy sitting across his chest. He was still holding the device above his head, only now '_above his head_' was easier accessible for the tan boy. He clamped on to it tightly so Mello wouldn't be able to get it. Mello seemed to be thinking, and Headquarters were still, everyone wondering what he was up to—they should've seen it coming.

Before they could blink he kissed L, and in the moment of surprise and inattentiveness he managed to take back the plane, and pushed himself away from the older boy. The camera followed him as he did a victory dance, leaving behind a confused and aeroplane-less L.

Next up was a half-naked L, typing away on his computer, and a Mello in bed, the blankets reaching just below his bellybutton. He stretched catlike, and his hand looked for a bar of chocolate on the bedside-table. What could he say? Matt wanted a cigarette after sex; he wanted brown goo-y goodness. He nibbled on the corner of his bar and glanced over at L once. Fixating on the ceiling he asked: "would you still love me, were I normal?"

It seemed as if something had triggered his train of thought, but Light couldn't figure out what it was. Between the just lying there, and picking up some chocolate, something must have happened, because the blonde was still staring sadly at the ceiling.

"I doubt it. If you were normal, you'd just be any other blonde." L said without looking up from the screen.

"I hate it when you're honest." Mello sighed.

"Oh, come on Mello," L turned to him for a moment; he'd noticed the sullen expression Mello had gotten. "I'd love you no matter what; don't go on the 'everyone calls me a freak'-tour again—you're always sad when you do, and I don't quite like it when you're sad."

"It's not that," Mello argued. "I mean, Jeesh, we're perfectly normal, they're the weird ones! It's just... I dunno..." he sucked on the corner, seemingly deep in thought.

"I think you're just being delirious and need sleep." L commented, going back to his typing.

Mello glared.

"I'm not delirious, you sad sod," he put an arm under his head, making himself more comfortable. "And you shouldn't lecture me about sleep, since you're not getting any sleep yourself."

"Watari would kill me if he knew you were staying up this late." L replied dully—as if that would get the blonde to sleep.

"Watari would kill you if he knew you were fucking me, but that doesn't seem to stop anybody either." Mello bit of the corner and went on to the next one, sucking on it first.

The ticking on keys stopped and Mello focussed his attention on L, who was staring at him. Light wondered if L would get pissed—part of him hoped he would. Watari had been rather shocked at hearing Mello's words, but couldn't quite contradict them. He did feel a bit murderous after seeing all the footage.

"We don't fuck, so it doesn't count." L put his thumb to his lips.

"Oh, but of course we don't," Mello said sarcastically. "I'm sure you're just on your way to the shower and get seriously disorientated or something," L got up, shrugging. "Or we just happen to be naked and you accidentally trip," he sat down next to Mello, quirking an eyebrow, wondering what would come next. Mello rolled his eyes. "No, seriously, if it wasn't fucking, than what the hell did you think you were doing down there?"

L kissed Mello's cheek in a sweet and honest motion and cocked his head.

"I thought we were making Love." He said in a low voice, and for the first time ever, Mello blushed a deep pink.

He sat up straight quickly, leaning against the headboard a bit, and the sheets slipping down to reveal more of the tan skin.

"Well, of course..." he didn't really know what to say. "I just... I mean... it is... but... somehow I don't think Watari will see the difference?" He ended doubtfully.

L wasn't satisfied with the answer—or maybe he was, and was just pretending not to be—and slumped down against the headboard sadly. Mello immediately jumped at the change of behaviour—apparently a sad L wasn't something he was used to.

"Please don't be sad," he pleaded. "That's not how I meant it—it's not just cheep sex or anything," he went on, putting his head against L and staring up through his blonde bangs. "Please," he kissed his cheek quickly, returning his head to L's chest. "I really do love you, don't be sad."

"I'm actually... tired." L confessed.

Mello's worried face grinned, and he put his half-eaten chocolate bar on the nightstand. He scrawled deeper under the blankets, pulling L with him.

"Me too."

And the next image was complete black-ness.

Mello and L were eating cake—well, L was eating cake, and Mello was watching him eat cake. It only took a second, because then Mello pecked him sweetly, and everything went black again.

Then they were suddenly both naked and—_sweaty_? And Mello was on top of L, pinning him down, and a blanket covered their groins. And Mello bent over and kissed him on the lips and—the scene dissolved. (Matsuda was rather disappointed. He wanted action!)

There was a strange image—one that wasn't filmed with a normal camera. It was filmed with a security camera, filming the street, and Light wondered how they'd gotten hold of the footage. They appeared to be going somewhere, since L was for once wearing actual clothing—you know, something you could go out with, not the white sweater and worn-out jeans. He was wearing a white button-up shirt, with the first buttons opened, since it was a sunny day. His jeans fitted better around his lean form, and one of his hands was tucked deep into his pockets—the other was entwined with Mello's. He was wearing sunglasses—which really surprised Light—and he glanced around cautiously every now and then. He was even wearing shoes. Grey sneakers. A mid-thigh-reaching jeans short clung around Mello's hips. He was wearing a black waistcoat and a thick jacked with a hood—it hung from his shoulders, and Light wondered why he'd even worn it in the first place, since it wasn't doing its job. He too was wearing loose sneakers, as if dressed to run. One hand was in L's, the other was holding two balloons. It wasn't until a kid with a gigantic teddy bear passed, and they heard someone squeal that they didn't want to ride the rollercoaster, that they realised Mello and L had been to the carnival. By that time the scene was already disappearing.

Mello was in a towel, mumbling something like: "you should come too." And pulling off L's shirt.

They were in a garden and were playing chess—it even seemed as if Mello was winning, until L took his queen and said: "checkmate." Mello didn't say anything, just stared at the board—until L kissed his cheek and he smiled.

Matsuda was quite disappointed, honestly. The small images raised loads of questions, and made him curious, but they lasted mere seconds.

They gasped as one person when a tied-up Mello came into view. Someone had tied him to a chair, and he was _not_ happy about it. He moved around spastically, trying to free himself from his bounds, when a door behind him opened, and a completely innocent and pie-eating L entered the room. Light and the others laughed when they saw the expression on his face, when he'd noticed Mello was there and tied to a chair.

"Mello?" He questioned, coming over with the cake. "What is wrong?"

"_What's wrong_?" Mello seethed. "I'm tied to a chair and you ask _what's wrong_! Untie me or you're not getting any tonight!"

More laughter—except from Light. He got a sour expression. Watari didn't look happy either.

L put his plate on Mello's lap. Mello looked quite insulted that L dared use his lap as table, but he refrained from complaining, since L started to untie the ropes.

"Who and why did they tie you up?" L asked, quickly taking a spoonful of cake whilst he worked on the tight knobs.

"Matt!" Mello ranted. "And he put the blasted camera right in front of my face—it'd thought I'd lost it after you kicked it last time—so he could make sure I wouldn't cheat!" Mello went on, while L tugged. "It's not fair! I mean, he's two years older, he knows that he's... I mean, of course he'd be more grown and... well, they won't let me compete, which isn't fair!"

"Compete in what?" L asked, and released Mello completely.

"Doesn't matter," Mello said, getting up. "Matt knows I can't win because he's seen me naked this one time, so it really—" he stopped all of a sudden, and L stared questioningly at him.

"Oh," he seemed to have gotten an idea, because he pulled L away and started running. The camera chased them, and L was forced to follow the blonde due to the fact that they were holding hands. "I'll make Matt pay for tying me up like that!" He yelled, as they continued running.

Suddenly they stopped, and Mello opened the door. Matt and Near were inside, Matt was just zipping up and Near looked sort of defeated. Matt frowned.

"Hey Mells, you know you can't win so why are you—"

Everyone went into a state of shock at the exact same time, as Matt's eyes widened considerably. They couldn't see L's face, but they knew he was as shocked as they were. Why wouldn't he be? Mello had just pulled down his pants and boxers, without even consulting him.

"Oh no! That doesn't count!" Matt shrieked, still staring at L's lower half.

"Stop looking!" Mello scolded, safely tucking up L's pants again. "And of course it counts! What's his is mine, and the other way around! So, so is his... well, penis," L put a hand against his head in embarrassment at the blonde's words. "And _that_," Mello pointed back at L's anatomy. "Is definitely bigger than yours!"

"Oh man," Matt grunted. "This sucks. You and your stupid penis." Matt scolded at L, glaring in defeat.

"Hey!" Mello frowned. "No insulting the penis!"

L shook his head, and said: "you are all insane," then walked to the door, tightening his belt some more. When Mello wanted to interrupt he put up his hand and continued: "and you're _not_ getting any tonight."

"But, but..." Mello protested feebly, and followed as L left.

Matt laughed his arse off and Near continued to blush. The room dissolved. Matsuda snickered. Then suddenly there was a half-naked Mello, wrapped in only a blanket, throwing a vase at a fully-clothed L. And Matsuda stopped snickering immediately.

"Mello, _please_ be reasonable!" L tried.

The younger boy glared and tried to smack him in the face. L caught his wrists and held them together—he looked void as always, Mello looked downright diabolical. The blanket swayed dangerously low on his hips and Mello tried to free his hands.

"Please, just listen to me," L said feebly, forcing Mello's body close to his own so he could restrain the blonde. "Be reasonable, it doesn't..."

Mello cut him short.

"Be _reasonable_!" He ranted, eyes shooting thunder at L. "Goddammit! Just bloody break up with me or something! But don't give me some lame-ass excuse that we can't talk and it might take a while!"

"Mello, please, I do not want to fight about this." L looked rather sad about the situation, and Light thought he might know what the fight was about.

"Well, too bad for you, but life doesn't always go the way _you_ want it to," he fought against L's hands again, trying to get away, but he couldn't. "I find it rather pathetic of you that you'd make up stupid excuses. Just be honest with me already! Just tell me it's over!"

"You're insane," L said, eyes boring into Mello's. Matsuda was shaking with anticipation—dramatic television was his sort of thing, never mind that this was real-life. "I am not breaking up with you Mello, I do not want to. I love you."

"Yeah sure," Mello screamed, tears welling up in his eyes. "We can't talk and we'll be apart for God knows how long—but you love me."

"Mello, it will be over in no time, I prom-..."

"God, I hate you!" Mello interrupted. He was crying now, and it's the end. Light gasped not-so-quietly and everyone followed suit—they'd gotten used to the boy being rude, but never expected him to say something like that. "You always try to fix it but it always gets worse, because in the end you leave anyways!"

The monitor turned black again, and everything was oddly quiet, now that the blonde stopped yelling.

"That was..." Light began after five minutes of icy silence.

"Whatever it was, it couldn't have been part of 'Can't spell family without L'." Matsuda remarked. He was still shaking, obviously thrilled by what he'd seen.

Light pressed 'eject' and inspected the tape. He realised it didn't have a number on it, whilst all other did.

"I don't think it is, it doesn't have a number on it; all the others do." He said.

Matsuda was about to say something, when the door opened and L entered. Everyone stared in shock. He stopped walking when he saw everyone was watching him as if he was a dead man, and then noticed Matsuda.

"Matsuda, what are you doing in my chair?" He asked. Then said: "Is something wrong? You are shaking."

"Oh, no," Matsuda got up, and bowed deeply. "I'm very sorry L-san, I was just... sorry."

L nodded and took his place again, scrolling the mouse. He didn't notice Light putting the tape away quickly, or the shocked/admiring glances Matsuda kept on giving him.

Light pretended nothing had happened, and started helping L with the case. Watari sighed deeply, and declared he was going to make tea—he really needed to get over the urge to brutally murder L, because he was really a good man, and Watari was sure love couldn't be helped.

After another ten minutes of silence, L scolded at them for not doing anything, and they started working, trying to put the image of the sweating L out of their heads. But whenever they tried, it merely got replaced with the image of a half-naked, sad, blonde—and that didn't help one bit.

* * *

**AN: So, you want more? All you have to do is review!**


	5. Where L get's molested—

Can't spell family without L: Part five: Where L get's molested—and doesn't say a word and leaves the room.

**AN: WARNING: the age difference between Near and Mello isn't that big, I know—but I messed up ages, so when Near is ten, Mello's already fifteen or something.**

Light was freaking out. Oh, yes, he was! He was going to die, and that would just be too sad! Matsuda didn't look to comfortable either, and all the others just hadn't noticed L's interest in the tapes yet. Matsuda glanced at Light, as if to say: 'do something! He'll notice!' But Light didn't know what he _could_ do. He'd tried getting L's attention earlier, and had miserably failed.

Then L suddenly said: "there is something weird about the tapes—not only do they seem, misplaced, but it is only now that I notice that some have numbers on them, but others don't."

Everyone looked up at the three of them. Light looked at Matsuda again, and he could just see him asking: 'other_s_? You mean there's more than one that doesn't have a number?'

But then he noticed L was staring at him, and he couched.

"I hadn't noticed." He lied—he'd noticed one had no number, the one with all the... revealing pictures, though somehow he thought it would be better if he didn't mention that.

"We should see what is on those without a number." He said, staring at Light intently.

Before Light could react, Matsuda squealed and ran towards L's chair: "Oh yes! Yes! Let's do that!"

"Matsuda!" Light hissed angrily, and Matsuda stopped.

L looked at Light questioningly.

"You disagree, Light?"

"Oh," Light stuttered. "No, I just..." He trailed off. 'Matsuda is just a pervert—_that_'s why he wants to see that tape.'

"Well then," L smiled in the weird way that they'd gotten used to—he smiled a lot on camera. "Let's watch."

And in went the tape.

They were still in the clothes that they'd worn to the carnival. Their hands were still entwined and Mello was still holding balloons. Except now they were coming through a gateway, and a fluffy ball of... fluff was approaching them at rapid speed. It stopped when it had flung its arms around Mello's legs—it couldn't reach higher. The pale white boy—Near—had grown too, but he couldn't be older than ten, and Mello was still a lot taller. Mello and L both stared at the small child, and then Mello easily hoisted him up with one arm, putting him on his hip.

"What's with you?" He tried to sneer but the hoisting motion put him off.

"Matt's completely loosing it! He thinks _I_'m princess Peach!" Mello snickered and L smiled amusedly. "Oh, you think that's funny? Get this: he's Mario and this is an x-rated version."

L stopped smiling, Mello started howling with laughter.

"Man! Matt's such a perv!" Mello said with a weird smile, and with somewhat of awe in his voice. Near and L frowned. Mello looked at them, saying apologetically: "well sorry, but if you've lived with the guy for as long as you can remember, you sort of get used to it," but Near didn't seem convinced, and Mello oddly bent his arm to give him a balloon. It was white. "Here, just for you."

Contrary to the fact that Matsuda thought Near would be disappointed, he actually seemed quite happy. He kissed the blonde on his cheek, and then leaned over to do the same to L. Then he asked: "where did you get it?"

"Hmm?" Mello was staring off in the distance.

"The balloon," Near repeated. "Where did you get it?"

"Erm," Mello looked at L, who looked back. "Well..." he got a little blush. "We went to the carnival and they just sort of gave it to us."

"Nice," Near smiled again, looking up at the balloon. "Did you have fun?"

Mello nodded enthusiastically, and L unconsciously squeezed his hand—Light noticed anyways.

"Oh yes," they started to walk again, Near resting his head comfortable against Mello's chest. "There was a nice spot behind the rollercoaster where no one ever comes."

Near blinked.

"So you didn't actually ride the coaster?"

L shook his head.

"Rollercoasters are boring." He said matter-of-factly.

"But then why did you go?" Near asked.

"I made him," Mello grinned and L pushed the wide front door open for them. The view changed as they entered the building, now filming from inside the hallway. "But it wasn't all that bad, now was it?" Mello waggled his eyebrows seductively, and Near blushed bright pink.

Matsuda had to resist the urge to snicker and L just stared at the screen—it almost looked as if he wasn't even watching the tape.

"Yes, it was quite... enjoyable." Hallway-L said without emotion—though the pause said it all. The hidden innuendo wasn't all too hidden.

Mello winked and suddenly Matt's voice called: "finally, Mello you bitch!" the redhead appeared in a daze of red and stripes. "You couldn't have told me you were..." he blinked at the balloons. "Hey, why does he get one?"

Mello rolled his eyes, picking out a red one: "we brought you one too, you jealous bastard."

L took it from him and handed it to Matt, who gladly accepted.

"Okay then, I can forgive you for abducting the Mello-man!"

Mello grinned and put Near down again. Near once more thanked them, and left the frame, gesturing for Matt to follow.

Mello looked at L and... a phone rung. There was a moment's silence in which they exchanged looks. Mello had a good idea as to what the phone call meant. L reluctantly got it out, holding it against his ear.

Mello leaned against L's chest, hand on L's shoulder. The older man wrapped an arm around the boy's small frame. He continued talking in a rapid way, and the blonde frowned, probably understanding every word L spoke, even though he was talking in a foreign language. After a couple of minutes he hung up and looked down at Mello.

"I have to go." He said—he sounded a bit sorry, Light thought.

Mello didn't reply—just pecked him on the cheek, freed himself from L's arms, handed him a balloon and left the building again.

Light wanted to scream his lungs out—can you believe the anti-social-bastard? He didn't even have the guts to say anything! He just sat there, no emotion whatsoever. And it was annoying Light senseless. Matsuda held his breath, waiting for the next shot—he didn't need to wait for long.

"L?" Mello was in black pj's, rosary slung around his neck, sitting on his knees on the bed. L gave a nod, working away on his computer.

"It's my sixteenth birthday next week." Mello lurked at L, and Light knew he was up to something.

L's lips curved into a smile and he quickly glanced at the boy once, before continuing with his work.

"I know." He said.

"Well, I was thinking," Mello crawled off the bed in an animalistic way. "There's something I want very much, and you're the only one I want it from," L frowned, wondering what it was—Light was curious too, he must admit. But so was everyone else in the room—aside from L—so he didn't feel bad about it. "And I'm sure you wouldn't deny me one simple thing on my sixteenth birthday, right?" Mello crawled a bit closer, and then leaned back, sitting on his heels somewhere between the bed and the table L was working on.

"Sure, anything you want." L said, and sipped some sugary tea.

"Good. I think we should have sex." And out the tea went, covering the desktop and keyboard.

Matsuda gasped and snickered at the same time. Everyone else was dumbstruck—Watari slapped his hand against his forehead in shame. Had they raised that boy? Really? They hadn't done a too good job, apparently.

Mello sat quietly as L quickly grabbed a cloth and started cleaning the mess, cursing lightly through the occasional cough. Then he stopped suddenly and glared at the blonde boy.

"What on earth is wrong with you, asking me that?" He returned to the mess again, wiping away the tea.

"But we've been together for ages," Mello whined, sitting up a bit. "Don't you think it's about time we got a move on and started creating beautiful babies?"

"We can't have babies," L stated matter-of-factly. "It's physically impossible."

"We could try!" Mello sounded rather knightly, but Watari knew it was all an act to get what he wanted.

"No." L started getting off the bottom of the keyboard so he could clean the inside up.

"But I'd be really nice! I would stop taking Roger's cane... for a week!" Mello tried to bribe.

"No."

"You can half of the birthday-cake!"

"No."

"Three-fourths?"

"No."

Mello frowned. He wouldn't even trade sex for cake? Shit.

"I'll huddle up all the blankets!" He said in a threatening voice—deciding that bribing wouldn't help.

"I'll pull them back."

"I'll never kiss you again."

"You couldn't stop even if you tried."

Mello considered this. Then he decided on a different approach. One that would _have_ to work.

"Oh come on," he seductively crawled closer and L did his best to ignore him. "I've done my best not to be a horny teenager at all times, but every time I see you my hormones go mental!" He stopped at the feet of L's chair, looking up hopefully.

L looked down at the blonde at his feet and said coldly: "I have hormones too, and you walk around half-naked most of the time. Yet you don't hear my complaining about an unquenched need for sex."

Mello glared and then straightened up.

In one quick move he roughly ran his hand along L's inner thigh and whispered huskily: "oh, but you will."

Light's eyes widened but before he could do something stupid—like scream at the monitor-Mello, they suddenly landed in a restaurant. There were loads of kids, and L was the centre of attention—it appeared to be his birthday, as all kids were singing a song for him. On either side of L were Watari, and someone who they thought to be Roger—the man that had been discussed on the phone a couple of days before. The camera moved when the song stopped and next to Matt—who was handling the device—was Mello and Near. The redhead put down the camera and it filmed the three of them and some other kids. They were all eating all sorts of fancy foods—except for L, he had cake. He was watching the others as he ate quietly, for once sitting in a normal fashion—Watari had undoubtedly made him. Suddenly his eyes widened and Mello smiled sweetly at him. L stared at the boy.

"What are you doing?" He hissed, trying not to attract attention.

"Excuse me?" Mello asked politely, drinking some chocolate milk—he took the brown substance in any form.

"That foot is not supposed to be there." L said and ate pie, trying to glare, but pie made him too happy so he failed.

Mello grinned but by the look on L's face he obviously didn't move. Light tried to glare and succeeded—who knew what that foot was doing!

L gasped and his hands grabbed the table, Watari looked up in surprise.

"Mello!" L said in distress.

Mello leaned back and continued grinning, Matt snickered.

"You're such a spoiled brat." He said while stuffing his mouth with potatoes.

"I prefer persistent." Mello winked and L bit his lip.

Another image followed immediately afterwards.

L was working on his computer again, with Mello scurrying around. He had a cup in his hand and a towel around his abdomen and one on his shoulder. He appeared to be looking for something, cursing every now and then. After running around for ten minutes—curses getting louder and louder—he bent over L to search the drawer next to the table. L blinked, leaning back a bit and... Mello dropped the cup of tea in his lap.

"Mello!" L jumped up from the heat, trying the get it to go away. Mello was conveniently thrown on the floor as L continued to take his jeans off, hopping around in distress.

Mello grinned deviously when L didn't look, and then said fake-sympathetically: "oh God, I'm _so_ sorry."

L waved his hand impatiently, gesturing that it was okay. He then blew air at his wet boxers, the tea scalding his skin. Mello scrawled over as L waved air with his hands, flapping them in hope of relieving the pain. Matsuda felt sorry for L—that must have hurt. Luckily Mello was about to clear that pain.

"Here," Mello tugged away L's hands and L's eyes grew. He took the towel from around his shoulder. "Let me clean that."

He started petting against L with the cloth and L shrieked.

"Mello! Stop that!"

"But I'm _helping_." Mello said innocently.

L glowered.

"That's not helping, that's sexual harassment."

Mello just grinned and the image changed.

There was a very happy Mello in bed, smiling contently at an equally naked—yet rather insulted—L. They were covered with a white blanket, though it was obvious Mello's legs were wrapped around L's.

"That was..." he started.

"Rape." L finished.

Mello rolled over a bit, cuddling closer.

"Don't be such a pouty bitch. I let you top, didn't I? You should be happy!"

L looked at the blonde as if he was about to strangle him—instead he moved an arm and patted his hip.

"That's not the point," he said in a stern voice. "It wasn't supposed to happen."

"Of course it was!" Mello said defensively and cuddled even closer. "I planned this ever since you said no to me."

"I know that," L bit his lip. "But really, don't you think the tackling was a bit over top?"

"No. You're such a cold bastard and all the trying to trick you was making me really horny so I had to take action! Otherwise you would've denied me sex on my sixteenth birthday! That would've been so unfair, since everyone has sex on their sixteenth birthday!"

"That's really not what sex is about."

"I know, I know," Mello put his head on L's shoulder. "It's about love. And well, I really can't have you denying me the proof of love on my sixteenth birthday. I would've been very unhappy."

L sighed deeply and said: "it was still harassment."

"But you liked it," Mello whispered seductively and L frowned down at him. "So it really doesn't matter. And if it was really that bad," he continued with a pout. "We should just try again."

And L inclined his head and their lips touched while Mello wrapped his arms around the older man's figure.

Light wanted to scream out in distress, and Watari had decided that being ashamed of the blonde boy couldn't quite cut it—no, he now had a strange urge to repeatedly bang his head into the glass coffee table. Aizawa and Mogi looked like they were about to faint. Matsuda made exciting squeal noises.

In the next frame Mello was waking up, and L and Roger were hissing at each other in a corner. The blonde boy turned around lazily and opened one eye.

"It's unethical, not to mention unheard of! You can't just..." Roger began and Mello yawned, saying: "shut the fuck up, I'm trying to sleep here!"

The two men looked at him and Roger scurried to the side of the bed.

"Mello, are you okay?" He asked worriedly, and L rolled his eyes in exasperation. He was only wearing black pyjama trousers.

"Of course I'm okay," Mello frowned and patted Roger's hand away as it nervously felt his forehead. "Besides the fact that you two woke me up."

"Listen Mello," Roger began nervously, fidgeting with his cane. "You're not allowed to be in someone else's room at night, you know that," Mello glared. "But, I just... if you don't want to stay here, you can leave. You don't have to be here. You don't have to listen to L when it comes to... things like... this," he noted the naked body of the blonde's body. Mello's frown grew and L looked insulted... was he insinuating that...? "No one can force you. You can leave and I'll make sure L doesn't hurt you!"

Mello stared. Then he continued to sit up straight in a rapid motion, took away Roger's cane and started hitting him.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU PERV!" He screamed, and Roger ducked away from the cane. "L DIDN'T DO ANYTHING YOU STUPID BASTARD! HOW DARE YOU SAY HE WOULD HURT ME YOU FUCKED-UP BITCH! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING I DIDN'T WANT TO, YOU THICK," a very hard slap across the head and Mello got out of the bed, blanket around his body and cane in the attack. "IGNORANT," he chased Roger to the door, still hitting him as Roger squealed in protest. "BUTT-FUCKING SLUT!" And Roger was gone.

He glared at the door, took L's hand without comment and dragged him back to the bed.

"And now we're going to sleep until I decide we've had enough rest!" He pulled the man close to his body and closed his eyes again, the cane between their bodies.

"Sure," L whispered, still a bit shocked at the boy's outburst. He looked like he was afraid to move. But then he continued sweetly: "I forgot to tell you yesterday," Mello opened one eye in question. "Happy birthday Love."

And then they were in a cafeteria. Mello was ranting at Matt, cane in one hand and plate in the other. The woman behind the stales with food put some in the plate and they went on to the desserts. Matt looked sadly at his plate filled with peas and mashed potatoes—apparently he didn't like the vegetables.

"Can you believe that bastard," Mello went on. "He actually thought L raped me or something! The stupid narcissistic faggot. Next time I see him I'm going to fucking kick his ass!"

"Who are you talking about?" An indifferent voice came and Mello nearly got a heart attack.

He wheeled around in shock upon hearing the voice, and—in the middle of all his fright and shell-shocked-ness—sent the cane reeling up in the air, together with his peas.

"AUW! Mello, what on earth..." L rubbed his head where the cane had hit it. It fell to the floor with a deafening sound, between the peas and some mashed potatoes.

"Oh God," Mello put his hands in front of his mouth—he was such an idiot sometimes. Matt laughed at L's expression and Mello's stupidity. "I'm sorry, are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," L scooped a piece of cake up his plate, taking extra frosting. "So, who are you killing?"

Mello picked up the cane, decided he had enough peas left and together with Matt and L went to sit down at a table by the window.

"Roger, of course, that stupid..." he trailed off grumbling darkly.

Matt grinned and as Mello started consuming the potatoes he flexed L with a look. L didn't seem to notice at first, taking Mello's dessert—strawberry-short-cake, L's favourite—and rapidly plopping a piece into his mouth. When Matt was about to speak, the screen went blank and another scene rolled in.

Watari had a rather confused expression—why hadn't Roger told him, he'd obviously known something was going on, but he'd never uttered a word to him about it. Matsuda was nearly shaking with excitement—these tapes were _so_ good!

Mello was on his knees, and it was a funny sight. His hair was tied together into a ponytail and he was wearing a frilly apron around his tight leather pants. In one hand he was holding a jar of green soap, with the other he was scrubbing Matt and his' bedroom floor.

"What on earth are you doing?" A familiar voice came and they saw L's posture standing by the door.

Mello dropped the green soap in fright—he had a bad conscious, definitely when he was _cleaning_. Knowing who it was though, he didn't completely freak and just glared at the man.

"Matt dropped his cigarette here yesterday and I'm trying to get out the stain." Mello said and scrubbed a bit harder.

L stalker a bit closer, hunched as always.

"Is that... a ponytail?" He teased, but sounded dead-serious, causing Mello to sit down on his heels and glare again.

"Oh wauw. Four months and I get complaints about my hair?" Mello dipped his cloth in the soap and brought both of his hands to his lap.

"You look like a girl." L remarked, hands deep in his pockets.

"That'll be a big problem, now won't it, since you only do guys." Mello sneered.

"Don't be so harsh."

"Oh fuckin' hell!" Mello rolled his eyes and L came a bit closer. "I don't need your shit, Jesus Christ! What, a simple 'I missed you' is too much for the _great L_?" His voice was sarcastic and L sat down in front of him.

"You missed me?"

"Oh yeah, I totally cried myself to sleep every night." Mello whispered—voice still a bit sarcastic.

L reached out and pulled the ribbon from Mello's hair carefully, bringing the boy closer to him.

"I just like your hair better when it's loose," Mello's hands were caught between their chests and L grabbed the cloth that was staining his clothes. "And green soap isn't a good product to get cigarette stains out of wooden floors."

Mello clamped onto the white shirt and kissed the older man passionately. When they parted L blinked slowly and Mello stared as L seemed to notice something.

"Don't tell me..." L looked fake-shocked. "Is that an... apron?"

"Oh shut up and come here," Mello grinned and pulled L closer by the hem of his shirt. "You're getting served. I'll show you a whole different use of green soap."

And when their lips locked again, the monitor went black one last time. Everyone was silent—they didn't dare to say anything—and L turned in his swivel chair to face them.

"Now, you should all be honest with me," He said in a fatherly way—as if they hadn't seen him naked. "Did you watch one of the tapes when I wasn't here?" And Light just couldn't lie.

He nodded. L gave a curt nod too—of course he'd known—and without another word, he took the tapes from his desk, and walked out of the room.

Watari's eyes followed him. Everyone feared he was going to find brutal ways to kill him. Matsuda hung his head and Light felt like crying.

* * *

**AN1: Oh... I was typing this thing, and suddenly I wrote Mastuda ipo Matsuda, and it made me laugh so bloody hard! (Just thought you should know!)**

**AN2: So, yes, it's finished :o What'll happen next?? Only I know my dearies.**

**Give me loads of feedback and I'll share my wisdom of the tapes with you! Otherwise I just might deny you any more footage.**

**Love,  
Crazy4Moony**


	6. Where everyone shows their pervy side—

Can't spell family without L: Part six: Where everyone shows their very pervy side—and they're just there for the convention.

Light stared at the computer screen. This was just fantastic. L was nowhere to be seen—the prick hadn't come out of his room all day! As if them watching one tape without him was that bad! The bastard!—and now the computer appeared to be having a nice meltdown. The day couldn't get any better, now could it?

Matsuda was sulking because L had taken the tapes; Watari was poking the prepared cake with a fork. Everyone thought he was trying to bribe L out of his room with the smell, whether it be or not; it wasn't working. Aizawa and Mogi were doing their best to focus on something _besides_ the empty table where the tapes used to be, and Soichiro, Light's father, was actually sleeping on the couch. Well, _sleeping_. Light chose to pretend he was sleeping, though he very well knew his father had fainted.

And then there was the computer. It was saying: 'Security breach' in big red letter, but only Light seemed to care. Not all too much though—he had his head in his hands, sighing in distress. What was he supposed to do about this? The computer was nicely reporting that there was an intruder in the building, in the hallway, coming up to them, but that said intruder was corrupting their system, so they had no clue what he looked like. No clue what sort of weapons he might be carrying. Light sighed and turned the swivel chair.

"Okay," he said, loud enough, and Matsuda and Mogi looked up. Aizawa sighed and stared off in the distance. "So when the intruder comes through the door, be ready to knock him down if necessary!"

Matsuda dragged himself to his feet, and took a vase. Mogi took Aizawa's gun—not that he ever used it though. Aizawa took Mogi's—they were a bit distracted—and Matsuda blinked dumbly, put the vase down, and took his own gun too.

Light turned back to the screen. _Oh,_ he thought,_ nice. The red dot is coming closer._

"He's nearly here!" Then Light turned back, facing the door.

He wondered who was dumb enough to break into the building—did someone know L was hiding here, and had they decided to come brutally murder him? Was Wedy showing off?

The door opened with a faint clicking noise, and everyone pointed their guns at it, they clicked off the safety handle, and stared intently as the door opened. Watari looked up from his poking and...

"Why do people always want to shoot me?" A helmet was taken off and three guns fell to the floor. Watari gasped loudly and Light sighed in relief.

"Oh for God's sake," he glared seconds later. "Can't you knock like any normal person?"

"No. If I were normal, I'd just be any other blonde." Mello said, grinning.

He was wearing his leather trousers with a skull as belt buckle. His shoes were black boots with iron tips, reaching halfway his leg, and his trouser were tucked inside. His jacket was also made from leather, black with red stripes by his sides, and he zipped it open a bit, since he'd only been wearing it to protect him from the cold. His rosary was still the same, resting against the tight waistcoat. He held the helmet in one hand, knowing Matt would kill him if there was even as much as a scratch on the paint. He had a brown bag slung around his shoulder that rested against his hip—like a very manly purse would.

"Mello," Watari jumped up, abandoning the cake, and came ever to hug the boy. He even ruffled the boy's hair. "What are you doing here? And how did you find us?"

"Well, after we'd tracked the computer down, it wasn't hard to find this place—and it just so happens that it's close to the Nintendo-convention Matt wanted to attend." He released the older man, and then a phone rung.

Matsuda stared in awe as Mello fished his phone from the bag—this was like meeting your favourite TV-celebrity!

"Oh, hi Mattie, I was..." Mello began.

The redhead yelled something. They tried to understand, but the rant was too mad—it sounded something like: "WHAYOUDOWITHEDSTHNGIVEU!"

"Ah, I think..." he felt around in the bag, triumphantly pulling out a silver DS by its cord. "It's still with me."

"HOWDUKEPTINEEDTNW!"

"Well Mattie, you should've let me drive." Mello snarled, grinning proudly at his actions.

Another inexplicable grunt.

"You do that," Mello said. "But if they offer it in return for inta-ko-su(1), say no, okay Mattie. I don't want to find you somewhere in a dark alleyway completely used and half-naked. It'd be Soho all over again."

"That was once Mells!" They heard the redhead whine.

"Once is more than enough."

More grunting and Mello rolled his eyes at the phone.

"Of course. Because that wouldn't be unethical _at all_." He said sarcastically.

A short grunt, and the blonde hung up his phone, putting it away with the DS. Watari smiled and put an arm around the young boy, guiding him over to the sofa. Mello looked confused when he saw the man 'sleeping' there, but they sat down on the other sofa. They started talking in a rapid way, in some foreign language. Then Watari said: "but about the tapes; L took them with him to his room."

"Why?" Mello frowned, looking around the room to see all the faces staring at him.

"We've decided to just blame Matsuda for that," Light said, and Mello focussed on him. "It's easiest."

"Aha. You're the Light-person, right?" Light nodded—how Mello knew his name was beyond him. Now that he mentioned it; Mello had known his name during the Mello-message too. He wondered how he knew. "And the Matsuda-guy is..." He looked around, and his eyes fell on Matsuda. He grinned. "You."

"Yes!" Matsuda cheered, happy his new idol had recognised him so easily.

"So how did you piss L off exactly?" Mello asked, leaning back and quickly questioned: "is it okay if I put the helmet here?"

Watari nodded and Mello put his helmet on the coffee-table as Matsuda blushed.

"It's not only my fault!" He protested. "We just watched this one time, and erm... I guess there was some footage that L didn't want us to see, and then he found out and took them away."

Mello grinned.

"Jeez, these tapes must be good!" Mello seemed pensively. He couldn't really remember any tapes, unless... but that couldn't be.

"Well... I'm sure you'd be able to get them back," Light said and idea forming in his brain. "Then we can watch them together."

"Hmm, are you asking me to conspire against L?" Mello asked, with a stern look.

Light blushed—no one else would have noticed what he was up to. Mello did. He was apparently as bright as L.

"No," he stuttered. "I..."

"No problem," Mello got up. "I'll conspire against him anytime." And he winked.

"Mello!" Watari said exasperated.

Mello playfully hit Watari on his shoulder, grin widening. He took a bar of chocolate from his bag and said: "relax, I was kidding about the 'anytime'. But I'm sure they deserve some entertainment for all their hard work. So. Which way to L?"

Light smiled too, and started giving Mello directions. When Mello disappeared up the stairs, Light turned to the screen again, turning on the cameras. The red letters had disappeared, and made place for all the camera-views in the building. Matsuda's eyes lit up.

"Oh! Delicious idea!" He squealed and placed himself next to Light in L's chair.

Aizawa and the others gathered around the chairs. Watari got up.

"That's indecent, we can't spy on them!" He yelled.

"But we can!" Matsuda squealed again—a lot of denying would happen later.

Mogi agreed and the others nodded too.

"He took away the tapes, he shall pay!"

Light pushed some keys, and L's room came on the monitor. He was behind his laptop, the tapes next to his single bed—the other one used to be Light's, but L didn't mind that it was a one-person's bed, he didn't use it often anyways. Someone knocked on the door, and Matsuda inwardly squealed once more—this wouldn't be denied, since no one knew.

"Come in." L said, monotone voice in place.

Mello opened the door, and smiled when he saw the raven-head sitting by his computer.

"If you've come to beg me to give the tapes back," L said, probably thinking it was someone else. "I'm keeping them here."

The blonde closed the door, leaning against it and said: "well I wasn't planning on begging, but I'm sure I could persuade you into handing them over."

L looked up, eyes widening.

"M—mello?" He turned in the chair completely, hands on his knees. "But... how?"

"Matt wanted to come to this convention thing," Mello waved his hand, walking over to the bed. "And I decided to stop by."

He hoisted his bag over his head, and threw it onto Light's bed, going to where L was. Bending through his knees, he put his hands on L's and said: "I'm done running circles in your head, so we should talk."

"Mello, there really isn't anything to talk about," L frowned a bit. "You're making a problem where there isn't any."

"I'm not. I don't wanna just be waiting for the rest of my life," Mello rolled his eyes. "So you're now going to tell me if you want to do this or not."

L bit his lip and bent forward in the chair, their foreheads touching.

"I want it very bad," he whispered, but they could still hear him. "It's just a matter of when."

"No problem," Mello caressed L's hands. "Now that that's been established, I can wait."

"No ultimatums?"

"I'm not the ultimatum kind of person. Just make sure we do this before one of us dies—otherwise I'll be kicking your butt in heaven."

L smiled and put his lips to Mello's. Matsuda grinned as his new favourite couple made out. Light rolled his eyes, not admitting he was jealous as hell.

The two got up, lips still locked together, and Mello took off his jacket, tossing it on the floor. They parted a split second for some air, wherein L wrapped his arms tightly around the blonde's figure. Mello tugged the man closer by his jeans, connecting their bodies, then rapidly pulled the white shirt off over his head.

"In a hurry?" L asked between kisses.

Mello shook his head attaching his lips to L's neck.

"Six months without sex makes me horny, that's all. And you just shouldn't be so darn hot." He whispered against the other's skin.

L's hands went to the skull belt-buckle, and he grunted.

"Not that darn thing again—it's impossible to undo!" He complained, and Mello grinned, pushing him onto the single-bed.

Mogi thought he'd go into cardiac arrest—were they going to... Matsuda was hopping up and down on his chair: action! Yes! Light merely stared, transfixed.

L waited patiently as Mello focussed on undoing his own belt, pushing his trousers down halfway, then tugging off his boots, and kicking the leather off. He remained in his black underwear, with knee-high socks—they were striped, black and white, tight around his legs. And with his waistcoat still on too he bent down in front of L, pulling off his blue jeans, so he was just in his white boxers. Their lips connected again, and Mello crawled onto the bed, straddling the older man's hips, while L's hands slipped under his waistcoat, and he started unhooking the strings. He kissed every piece of skin that was exposed and Mello moaned hoarsely, leaning over so L landed on his back on the bed. The blonde head kissed down L's sternum, hands lightly on his ribs, which stuck out a bit from under the pale skin. He scraped his fingers over L's thighs and the man gasped harshly, his cheeks faintly blushing. They saw his toes curl, legs entwined with Mello's. His hands grasped onto the coppery skin by Mello's back, leaving evil scratch marks as he continued leaving hickeys all over L's chest. He crawled up the man's body again, and, wrapping one arm around the slender hip, rolled over, pulling L on top. The man fit in between Mello's legs perfectly, and he eagerly ran his hands down the boy's torso, their lips bumping against one-an-other's. He sat up a bit, slowly sliding his hands over the socks, and sliding them down and off. Connecting their bodies again he then successfully managed to get off their boxers without losing too much proximity.

(Light wanted to comment but he could see L's pale arse, so he refrained.)

They heard Mello moan—loud this time, and L's hand appeared from between their bodies. They kissed again, and the blonde's legs spread wider, his inner thighs touching L's sides, his feet hanging in the air. He buried his head in L's neck, and they could see his face, flushed and eyes shut tightly. L leaned his weight on one arm, whispering something in his ear. They couldn't hear what though, but Mello shook his head, grunting something back, and wrapping his arm around L's shoulder, for stability, shifting his body a bit. L's lips attached themselves to Mello's neck, only his black mop visible, and the blonde bit his lip hard. Suddenly L's waist moved roughly and Mello loudly cried out, the sound echoing through the room.

Matsuda's eyes widened—he might be somewhat ignorant, but it was obvious what was happening. Aizawa's mouth was wide open. Watari closed his eyes. Light stared.

Mello's hand clawed at L's back, and a sheen layer of sweat glistened on their skin. His toes uncurled a bit, one foot dropping and touching L's leg, but his thighs clamped tighter around L. They stilled and L used his free hand to wipe away some of the hair hanging in front of Mello's face, pecking his cheek in a concerned way. Mello turned his head and L kissed him sweetly, saying in a hoarse voice: "are you okay, Love?"

"Mmm," he nipped lightly at L's bottom lip and murmured: "'m fine. Just... move."

L's hips moved up and down slowly, and Mello opened his mouth, though he didn't make a sound. L took Mello's chin and enclosed their lips. When they parted the man teasingly stroked his fingers over Mello's thigh, making the blonde moan breathlessly. His own hand moved over L's sweaty skin, and he left marks with his teeth against the other's neck. They continued in a normal speed, keeping their movements in sync as Mello's hips moved with L's. They could still see his face leaning over L's shoulder, biting his lip and moaning hoarsely every now and then. L's breathing was hard, they could hear that too, but he too moaned and groaned—although softer than Mello. After some time their pace speeded up, and Mello's arm clamped harder around L. L's arm shivered slightly at having to hold his weight, but they managed fine, moving without pausing.

Suddenly the blonde's slender legs, that'd been hanging in the air the whole time, stiffened, feet nearly touching each other, and his toes curled together tightly. His hand grasped at L's skin, slipping the entire time and he arched his back, head next to L's. He made a faint: "Anh!" sound and whispered something that should've been L's name—but it was too incoherent to be sure. L moaned out Mello's as his own body went stiff too, and then they shook together, and went still seconds later.

L dropped through his arm, and flipped them over again, before his weight crushed Mello. He kissed the top of Mello's head faintly but didn't say anything. The blonde shifted comfortably between L's legs, revealing some of the light pencil stripe hairs on his waist, but not much, since L's leg rested again him. He put his head against L's shoulder, and started drawing figures on L's chest, dragging around droplets of sweat.

They didn't talk for ten minutes—it could've been ten seconds too. Matsuda said: "wauw." first. But it didn't matter. The others were too intend on watching the rest to even notice. The room was oddly quiet without their noises, and they watched as the two basked in the after-glow of their love-making.

"It was really reckless of you to come here." L whispered suddenly, breaking the comforting silence.

"I know," Mello nodded, arm slipping around L and eyes closing. "But I'd do it again."

L laughed, though it sounded a bit raw, voice still hoarse from their former activity.

"It's just all about the sex with you." He said teasingly—though there was a hurt undertone.

"No," Mello kissed L's chest with closed eyes. "It's all about you."

L continued stroking Mello's hair for a few minutes. Then suddenly his eyes locked with everyone's in the room as he looked right into the lens. Light inwardly cursed. Matsuda cursed aloud.

L's eyes widened and Mello felt the change.

"What's wrong?" He asked, shifting slightly—he'd been close to sleeping. "You're not at ease."

"The..." L swallowed, sitting up straight, and bringing up the blankets with his toes.

"Don't," Mello complained, pushing it back, but L forcefully pulled it to their bodies. "I'm too hot!"

"The camera's on!" L blunted out. He pointed at it, and Aizawa's eyes widened. Watari panicked a bit. "The light's on!"

L sat up and Mello sleepily crawled to the man's chest, being cradled between his legs, he was obviously not content with the interruption. He put one hand over the blanket, at L's hips, yawning.

"Isn't that normal? Can't you just take the tape out later?" He asked, opening one eye lazily.

"They don't tape—the light only burns when we watch the view from the particular camera in the main room!" L glared and Light quickly pushed a button.

The monitor turned black. Light jumped up and yelled: "come on! Move your buts! Pretend like you've been working! Or else L'll have our heads!"

They sprang apart, going to their tables and quickly picking up stacks of paper. Watari sighed deeply and retreated to the hallways, probably heading for his room, he wasn't willing to be there when L arrived. Soichiro remained on the couch. By the time they heard footsteps upstairs Light had already opened up the files, and pretended to be looking for clues. They all waited, stressing horribly but trying not to let it show. Footsteps came down the stairs, soft thuds with every step and Light turned his chair, planning on playing the innocent act—maybe they were still convincible.

As soon as he saw them, he knew it was too late. Oh no. L was very certain they had been watching, Light could tell. You know, because of the fact that L was just wearing his jeans, which weren't zipped up completely either. They could see the love-bites Mello had left on his chest and neck, and his body was still a bit damp. And Mello just had L's white and too-big shirt on, and his own black underwear, his gun between the waistband and his hip. He'd also half-pulled his socks on, one reaching below his knee, the other halfway his leg. L's hand was lying protectively on his hip, and Mello had a glare of impendent-doom on his face. They smelled faintly of boyish love, a sweet smell, with a spicy tang.

Light swallowed. Matsuda hid his face in his hands. Aizawa and Mogi went red at seeing the two. Soichiro grunted, safely away on the couch.

"I find it very concerning that you think you have the right to spy on me," L said boldly. "You work for me—I don't think it's necessary that you know what I do, when I do it, and who I do it with."

"We didn't..." Light began, but didn't know how to finish.

"You didn't what? Watch?" L asked, tipping his head to the side.

Light groaned.

"Okay, yeah. We watched," Light admitted, getting up. "But it's because of the tapes!" He defended, and everyone nodded to support him. "They made us curious!"

"Fucking hell," Mello sneered. "I don't know what's on those things, but I'm sure they don't give you the right to invade our private lives!"

"We don't have to," Light snapped back. "The tapes do it for us!"

"What the hell do you mean!" Mello turned to Matsuda, who looked at the floor.

"You call them 'Can't spell family without L'..."

Mello groaned. L looked surprised.

"You have those?" He asked.

Everyone nodded, even L.

"And you watch them?"

Everyone nodded again.

"Great," Mello glared at Light. "You know, I had this idea about you from the beginning," he snapped. "But now that I know you've watched the tapes—and probably those others that come with them too, I'm sure: you're so gay, Yagami."

Light glared angrily and spat: "at least I'm not as pathetic as to hold on to something that always leaves!"

"Okay that's it!" In one second flat, Mello had pulled out his gun and pointed it straight at Light's head. "Be careful what you say next, you pitiful bastard," he snarled. "I killed people for a lot less than bad-mouthing!"

L pulled the boy close to his body, pushing down his arm, and inclosing him in a hug so he was harmless.

"Mello, please put the gun away," he said, and Mello grumbled but put the weapon back in his waistband. "Light, our relationship is none of your concern and I'd appreciate if you'd stay out of it—no matter how much you think you know!"

"I'm sure Light didn't mean any harm, L-san." Matsuda backed Light up.

"You had no right to watch," L ignored Matsuda's statement, hands on Mello's hips. "None of you!" They all bowed their head in shame. "I don't care whether the tapes made you curious or not, it's none of your business."

"Yeah, I can totally get you would want to get back to L or something," Mello said—half-grinning up at said man. "But I didn't do anything to you! You have no right to see me naked or something like that!"

"We were just—"

"Nothing excuses this behaviour!" L interrupted. "I don't watch any of you when you're in your own room!"

"You spied on me!" Light sneered.

"Because you have a high percentage change of being Kira," L said. "Which is going up, by the way!"

"What? How does me watching you while... well, how does that make me Kira!" Light yelled in confusion.

"You might've watched to find out my real name." L said bitterly.

Mello slapped his hand in front of his own mouth, and they could see him think: "Oh. My. God."

Matsuda murmured: "don't worry; we didn't hear either of your names."

"Doesn't matter, it could've been your plan!" L glared at Light.

"Oh come on, that's so farfetched!" Light glared back.

"No it's not."

"Yes it is! We didn't know you would... say each other's names!"

"Yeah, L-san," Matsuda said. "Light's a virgin he wouldn't know that in a moment of passion you..." he shut up when everyone stared angrily at him. Light looked furious, and was blushing a deep pink.

"Do I look like I care about Light's sexual experience?" L asked irritated. "Because I honestly couldn't care less! And honestly, you spied on us during a very private moment, I have the right to add to your Kira-percentage!"

Light didn't comment, but turned his head away. He heard Mello whisper something and L said: "of course, go ahead."

Mello walked past Light, glaring on his way, and grabbed the keyboard, opening a window. He started typing letters and numbers, and in less than a minute a window saying: 'please hold. Matt is connecting' appeared. Mello hummed softly, tapping his fingers on the desk. He scratched the back of his leg with his foot. L sat down in his chair, sternly looking at the others, and waving his hand to tell them to go back to work.

"Hey Mells!" They heard a voice, and another window appeared—the redhead was somewhere in an arcade. "Is your phone dead again?"

"Yep, the battery's completely dead. I swear to God, we need to nick a new one soon—it always fails on me." Mello said.

Matt smiled and then frowned.

"What's with the outfit Mells? You look post-sex-ish. And than you tell me not to shag the Japanese guys?" Matt laughed, and someone blabbered something on the background. A couple of legs walked past Matt's back, but he didn't notice.

"L's not Japanese Mattie, so I didn't disobey my own rule," Matsuda shrugged, but shut up as L glared—he was not in a happy mood. "Hey listen, you know the 'Can't spell family without L' tapes? The really old ones?" Mello asked.

"You mean the ones when we were kids? Not the new ones." Matt scratched his head, fixing his goggles.

"Yeah. You know, the ones I told you to burn?" Mello continued.

Matt nodded.

"Okay, let's go through this in a way that you'll understand," Mello said idly. "Mattie, when I tell you to _burn_ the tapes, I mean set them on fire! Not keep them—and the others—so Roger can confiscate them, give them to Watari, who gives them to L. 'Burn the tapes' equals 'throw them on a pile with gasoline and a match'! Jeez," Mello sighed. "Next thing I'll ask you to behead a guy and you'll come back with his pinky."

"Oh, I'm sorry Mells," Matt apologised. "I didn't know Roger would find them—I hadn't even noticed they were gone. And really, I kept them because they were nice to remember our childhood."

"Childhood?" Mello raised and eyebrow. "Okay, I can get why you wanted to keep some of the tapes—but the parts where your camera chased me as I was luring L into having sex with me? What was that all about?"

"Oh, that was just fun," Matt grinned widely. "But don't worry, Roger doesn't know where I keep the really recent ones—the stuff we seriously want to keep," Mello nodded. "So they won't be passed around. Listen, they're about to start the cos-play—this, I don't want to miss: I'll pick you up in three hours or so! Tell the L-dude I said hi!"

He waved, and the window shut itself. Mello shook his head, and smiled.

"Matt says hi, L-dude," Mello turned to him. Suddenly he bit his lip. "Jeez, I need to pee!"

L grinned, and got up taking Mello's hand.

"I'll show you where the bathroom is." And without even looking at his team, he left the room.

Matsuda stared at the door, and blushed a sweet pink: "do you figure he's very mad?"

Light shrugged his shoulders, and turned to the screen—he didn't quite feel like getting into another fight, or discussion. Or anything really. He just wanted to bust Kira's ass and get out of there.

Ten minutes later L and Mello entered the room again, talking silently to each other, hands entwined as they made their way to the kitchen. They were still scarcely clothed, but it wasn't really all that bothering—the building had a nice warm temperature anyway. Mello pulled up one sock again as they entered the kitchen. Matsuda looked at Light once, whose eye twitched spastically—it frightened him a bit, Light had probably been staring at the monitor for too long—and he got off his chair, entering the kitchen after the other two.

Mello was stirring his beverage idly, leaning his head somewhat tiredly against L's shoulder as he talked about something Matsuda didn't quite catch. L was sitting in his usual manner—it was something to admire, the way he didn't topple over and off those small, high chairs. Mello had one leg to his chest, sock showing, but revealing his tan knee too. They both looked up when he entered the room, but he just smiled, deciding to be super nice to them. That's why he made his way over to the fridge, saying: "pff, Watari's been hiding for a while now, hasn't he?"

Mello took a sip from his cup and said: "are you sure he's not bleeding to death through his nose?"

Matsuda laughed, turning to the blonde boy. He continued chuckling and then said, face suddenly serious: "oh, now that wouldn't be fair to the rest of us. We'd all accepted the fact that there would be terrible nosebleeds, and had sworn that they would not be hidden. We could openly show each other that it would be... toe-curling," he winked at the blonde. "And we'd been warned! Didn't you notice the stained shirts, though?" He joked, and opened the door to the refrigerator.

Mello chuckled, and L glared at the other man. Matsuda smiled apologetically, and went over to the kitchen-island, where the two were seated, carrying a piece of cake and a cooled bar of chocolate. He presented the cake and chocolate to them as a peace-offer and sat down on the other side of the island.

"So," Matsuda began, as the two began consuming the offered goods. "You're an item?"

L tried to glare—the cake put him off terribly, and Mello nodded.

"Have been since I was twelve—that's over six years."

Matsuda smiled even more sweetly, carefully noting how the blonde took some of L's chocolate frosting—and L didn't complain. And how their hands kept on 'accidentally' touching.

"Over six years? Wauw! I had no clue L had a special someone." Matsuda said, loving how L once more tried to glare without succeeding.

"Chee," Mello said, laughing slightly and looking over at the raven-head next to him. "I had no idea I was someone's special someone."

"Pff," L huffed, amusing Matsuda even more. "Of course you did."

Mello's trade-mark grin crept onto his face and he bent over to kiss the man slowly on his lips, giving Matsuda quite the show. He felt like squealing, but since he'd been trying so hard to get Mello to somewhat tolerate his presence; it didn't seem like a good idea. He was sure the boy was con-squealing.

The two parted and Matsuda decided on a happy sigh.

"Couples are sooo cute!" He said—refraining on giving his voice an all-too girly quirk.

L rolled his eyes in exasperation and Mello scowled: "I am not _cute_. Nor am I part of anything that is cute. I _do not do_ cute."

This had L smiling again and Matsuda bowed his head in understanding. He watched them eat for a while longer, thinking of things he could say, or ask, anything. He had a million things he wanted to ask—but didn't know _how_ to.

Eventually all three left the kitchen, and entered the main room again. By now, Soichiro had awakened, and looked rather insulted at the half-naked boy. So did Misa, who had just entered the room. Light was on the couch, also drinking some hot beverage, and the couple sat down in front of him, while Matsuda went over to the table where Mogi and Aizawa were pretending to work. L didn't talk to Light, and Mello yawned, outstretching and putting his head in L's lap, evidently forcing the man to sit in a normal fashion.

"I haven't had the pleasure to meet this young man." Soichiro said politely, as Misa drawled over and placed herself next to Light. Soichiro sat on Light's other side, and Mello smiled, eyes closed.

"I'm Mello—nice to meet you. You were... sleeping, earlier."

"Ah, yes," Soichiro vaguely recognised the boy. But where from? "I'm Yagami Soichiro, Light's father. Are you related to L?"

Mello got the same grin on his face as earlier, something tricky—half-mocking Soichiro's ignorance, as well as his innocence and honest uprightness. Misa looked interested too.

"No, dad," Light said, since L and Mello stayed quiet. "They're... together as a... couple."

Soichiro's mouth dropped, and L put his finger to his lips.

"Oh... but... you seem so young!" Soichiro wasn't so much buzzed by them being guys, more about the age-difference.

"Age is so trivial—and everyone wants a bit of L, I just got there first."

"I resent that." L interrupted.

"Resent all you want—everyone wants to be inside your jeans."

"They do not!" L objected, glancing down at the boy.

"Yes they do! Luckily they know by now that you're mine, or I could be batting them off with a pole!"

"I don't think poles are got for batting off stuff." L chewed his thumb thoughtfully.

"Fine, I'd be kicking their asses and would be spraying bug-spray in their eyes. The point is that I can count myself lucky I was first to get inside."

"Inside what?" Soichiro asked, confused.

"L's jeans, of course." And Soichiro blushed, while L just rolled his eyes at Mello's crudeness.

Light's father suddenly remembered where he'd seen the boy before, but one look from his son told him not to mention it—so he didn't. Misa huffed and leaned against Light. Light shrugged her off. Soichiro made conversation.

"So, where are you from?" He asked politely.

"England," Mello said silently, and yawned. "'m sorry, 'm bit tired."

"Oh no problem, don't let me interrupt your sleep." The older man said, and then focussed on his stressing son.

"Light-kun!" Misa whined. "Let's do something fun! If Ryuzaki is allowed to take time off, so are you!"

"Not now, Misa." Light grunted.

"But we could go out!" Soichiro as well as Light shook his head.

"No, it's only a short break Misa, I'll continue the investigation soon."

"But L got time off!"

"What makes you think that?"

"But his bitch is barely clad!" Misa said in high-pitched voice. Mello's eyes shot open, L's eyes widened. Light's yaw dropped. "So that must mean..."

She stopped when Mello roared: "You DID NOT just call me a bitch!"

She blinked at him innocently—he wasn't fazed.

"Isn't that what they call the man in a gay relationship that goes bottom?"

Mello glare-of-impendent-and-painful-doom made Misa realise she'd made a gruesome mistake, and she backed away, trying to sink away into the couch, apparently.

A nano-second later Mello had pulled his gun for the second time that night, and was yelling, fighting against L as he tried to restrain him.

"YOU STUPID BRAINLESS SLUT! NO WONDER THE DUDE WON'T TAKE YOU OUT! WHO WOULD WANT TO GO OUT WITH SOMEONE AS STUPID AS YOU? I BET YOU'RE AS SMART AS YOU'RE PRETTY—NOT AT ALL, BUT THAT DOESN'T EXCUSE YOUR FUCKING RUDE MOUTH!" he pushed away from L, as he tried to get him to calm down and Misa whimpered. Soichiro's eyes widened, but Light just blinked—Mello'd pointed the gun at him too, and dead Misa wouldn't be so bad. "I DON'T JUST CALL YOU STUFF EITHER NOW DO I? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU! YOU BETTER FUCKING RUN BEFORE I PULL THOSE STUPID PONEYTAILS OUT OF YOUR BLOODY EMPTY HEAD YOU—"

L had managed to get a hold of the spitting fire that was the pissed off blonde, keeping Mello's back against his own chest, Mello's legs flying around angrily, and gun still pointing at the blonde girl's shocked face. She looked close to tears—Light was still secretly cheering for Mello—but Mello didn't give a rat's ass, as L turned him away so he couldn't shoot Misa, he kept on kicking with his legs, and squirmed to point his gun at her from over L's shoulder.

"Mello," L cooed, trying to calm him, but this time he'd really been set off. Light gulped and Misa hid her face in his chest in fright—he pushed her off again. The boy didn't listen. "MELLO!"

The kicking stopped and the blonde hung limply in L's arms until the older man put him down. Pushing the hair from his face, and tucking the gun back in Mello's boxers he said: "ze is gewoon boos omdat er nu iemand is die blonder en duizend keer mooier is dan zij—en haar domheid is nu eenmaal verbazingwekkend."(2)

Mello blinked once, then his glare softened and he stood on tiptoes to kiss the older man again. L dipped his head to meet him halfway, then scooped his lithe body up in his arms, walking back to the couch. He sat down, and soon Mello had resumed his earlier position, eyes closed.

Misa looked as if she wanted to say something, but L shook his head in warning—a word and he might be off again. After all, Misa had called him a bitch, which is a very bad thing. Mello was no girl! Therefore he was no one's bitch! Not even L's.

Soichiro was still somewhat in shock, and decided not to say anything else. They sat in quiet, Light sipping his drink every now and than, happy Misa was still clinging onto the side of the couch rather than his chest. Sometimes Mello would squirm a bit in L's lap, and claw at his knee or the fabric of the white shirt he was still wearing. It wasn't until he murmured something harshly that L looked down in somewhat of concern. Mello moaned in pain, and clawed at his own shirt again. L frowned and took his hands, so he couldn't hurt himself or something, and started gently shaking him.

Soichiro said: "is he having a bad dream or something?" Frowning.

Light looked at the blonde too—he was definitely having a nightmare. He was sweating slightly, and frowning in his sleep, murmuring something incoherent. L shook his shoulders, more urgent.

"Mello, wake up," he said. Mello moved a bit, seemingly calming down. "Wake up," he shivered. "Mello?"

Then the boy's eyes opened suddenly, and Misa gasped. He frowned, closed his eyes again, and yawned.

"What? What's wrong?" He asked, yawning again, and sitting up straight again.

"You were dreaming. Moved spastically. Clawed at my knee." L said, though it sounded a bit like a question.

"Oh, I'm sorry... I think I was..." he sat up straight, looking pensively. "Probably family-related dreams or something like that stupid shit."

"Mello..." that was definitely a question.

"It's okay," Mello smiled bitterly, and got up, outstretching. "Can we go dress? Matt will be here soon."

L nodded, sighing slightly, and they walked up the stairs, heading towards L's room again. When they came back they were both properly dressed. Mello took his jacket, putting it on but not zipping it up yet, and his helmet. He said goodbye to all of them, and together with L, left for the front door. Light got up, and walked over to the monitor again, clicking on the camera that showed them the hallway.

"Maybe it's not such a good idea?" Matsuda said.

"L will be back soon, and he'll want to watch Mello, I'm sure." Light said.

And indeed. They saw L kiss Mello and then walk back to the elevator, as Mello headed out. When L re-entered the room he didn't comment, but sat down and watched the screen.

Mello was outside, fumbling with his jacket a bit. His hair fluttered in the wind, when they heard an engine in the distance, Mello looked at the end of the street. They watched the redhead pull up from around the corner, stopping the motorcycle in front of the blonde. Mello held out the DS and Matt pulled down the boy to give him a quick friendly peck on the mouth, before he deposited it in his pocket. Then the blonde climbed up behind him, a bit grumpily for not being allowed to drive, and put on his helmet. In a second, the motor was running again and they were off.

L clicked a button, and the screen went black. He opened a file, and Light opened his mouth. Before he could talk, L said in usual monotone: "we're not talking about this—you've deeply disappointed me. All of you."

And he seriously meant it.

**AN (1): My dictionary told me it was 'intercourse' or 'sex' in Japanese. Correct me if the dictionary was wrong! And if it was, I deeply apologise.**

**AN: (2) well... it means: "she's just angry because there's someone more blond and more beautiful then she is—and her stupidity is indeed astonishing" or something along those lines, in Dutch. **

**AN: I'm sorry for all the mistakes that might have been made! I didn't re-read properly! I deeply apologise!**

**AN2: Next up: L is pissed off, but he allows them to watch a tape! Matsuda does happy dance Let me know if you want me to update though! Otherwise I won't.**


	7. Where we see Near’s ingenious plan—

Can't spell family without L: Part seven: Where we see Near's ingenious plan—and the booboo's need to be kissed!

It was weird. L was clearly furious with them still—he didn't say anything, when they tried to sweet talk him he scolded, and even sometimes yelled. He was _mother_-fucking pissed _off_, in a way only L could be. He had no trouble ignoring them for several hours straight. Nope. He could go on like this for ages. Yet here they were; about to watch a tape. Matsuda marvelled in their luckiness. Their very-very luckiness. Oh, the luckiness of their situation was simply unbelievable.

A young blonde and an even younger silverhead were in front of the telly in Mello and Matt's bedroom. They were staring transfixed at the screen, eyes wide and mouth agape. They didn't even blink. The blonde motioned at the camera—Matt, probably—to come closer.

"Come watch too Mattie. It's very scary." Mello said in awe, pulling his eyes away from the screen to focus on his friend.

"But Mello, I can't watch that!" Matt's voice squeaked. "That's boy-girl sex! It has bat-caves in it! They're evil!"

L leaned back in his chair, and Matsuda tried to refrain from hopping up and down. Oh, the joy. They were so cute! No matter what Mello thought about being cute! He was! Even when they were discussing... porn?

"But you're making _us_ watch!" The pale boy protested.

"Yeah, but that's because you can handle it!" The redhead objected.

Mello frowned: "no we can't! Bat-caves are scary!"

"Oh my God! I think it's moving!" Near squealed suddenly, quickly slapping his hands in front of his eyes, and then peeking at the screen through his fingers. Matsuda giggled.

"What!" Mello looked back immediately. The camera moved closer—apparently Matt was curious too.

"The bat-cave... I think it's moving!" Near said in a high-pitched voice. "Mello, I'm scared, what is it doing?" He cuddled closer against Mello's arm, frightened to death.

Then they suddenly both yelled: "IEEEEUW!"

"What, what?" Matt asked, putting his camera aside and running over to them.

"He just put his wiener in the bat-cave," Mello said, in feral shock. "That's just sick. Why would you ever want to do that?"

"Ieuw! They actually put it in the bat-cave! That's grose!" Matt yelled, now staring at the television too.

"Look! It moves!" Near pointed at the television, and the room filled with moans.

Soichiro's eyes widened. They were seriously watching porn—he'd wondered what 'bat-caves' were. How old were they? And they were watching porn. The improperness of it all didn't even stun Light anymore.

"Why is she making those noises Mattie? Why does he hurt her like that?" Mello asked innocently.

"I think that maybe they use it as a torturing-method." Matt said wisely.

"Oh." Both Mello and Near nodded in apprehension.

Mogi was close to bursting to tears. Those kids... he couldn't deny it. They were hilarious. L bit his thumb.

"I feel sorry for her," Near sighed. "No one deserves pain."

"It's grose." Mello just said.

"Yeah. Now I know why we're not allowed to do sex. It's used to hurt people." More nodding.

The three boys continued staring at the images, transfixed.

Then the screen went black. In the two seconds it took to show a new image, Misa managed to run into the room and place herself in Light's lap—no one else even seemed to notice. The brunette just pushed her aside irritated, wanting to see the next footage.

"Oh God, I'm so murdering you!" Mello's voice yelled, but they could only see Matt.

He was wearing his goggles, grinning wildly at the camera—he looked about fifteen. Near was next to him, but they couldn't see him completely.

"Hello my dearest none-existing grandchildren!" Matt saluted them. "This is Can't spell family without L, and today is the L-loyalty test! If you're not curious, you're lying!" He passed the camera to Near.

"Mello hates us as from today," the pale boy said sadly. "But, sacrifices need to be made! And," he turned around, probably looking at mentioned blonde. "No one will ever now—except for L."

"Shut up!" They heard the blonde snarl, and Near gave the camera to Matt again.

"The genius plan is simple, and refined in itself!" Matt said chipper. "Would L ever cheat on Mello—with a _girl_?"

"How to test this?" Near came in view again. "Simple. Dress up Mello like a girl and see if L would... hit him. Or her, whichever is correct."

"When to do it?" Matt grinned. "At the Christmas party tonight!"

Matt and Near both laugh maniacally, and they heard Mello scream angrily. The screen went black. Matsuda pouted—weren't they going to see Mello in a dress?

"Can't spell family without L, Near's log." The pale boy said. He was on the ground, one knee to his chest. One finger was twirling a white lock of hair. "Matt says it's a good idea to let you inside my genius mind—he seems to think I had an ulterior motive when I suggested we dress Mello up like a girl," he got a small smile on his face that made Matsuda melt. "I really don't. Mello in a dress will be hilarious—and it's not like L would actually go with the girl-Mello," he said, clearly convinced of his own words. "L wouldn't do that—however hard it will undoubtedly be on some people to believe this—I really think L loves Mello. And even though Mello tells me he doesn't want to wear a dress, I know he's just afraid this will prove that L doesn't love him, and hits on other people. But he wouldn't," Near's smile grew. "I'm sure of that. L isn't that kind of person. He knows us better than anyone else does—he wouldn't deliberately hurt us. And since he's a mastermind, he knows flirting with other people would hurt Mello, so he won't. He _won't_." He leaned forward, and shut off the camera.

L blinked once, and Light wondered what he was thinking. L knew how this went on—he had to. Why couldn't he show just some emotion, so Light could figure out whether the boys' plan had a good out-coming or not.

"God Matt, you suck." Mello said again, this time they could sort of see him—Near was blocking the view.

"No I don't. It's a perfect plan—Near came up with it!"

"Explain once more. What is the logic in it? I'm trying to seduce L, to see if he'd cheat on me? But if he does, can I complain, since he's cheating on me with... me?"

"Mells, no whining," Matt said sternly. "If he goes for the girl-Mello, you dump the mother-fucking bitch, and I kick his ass—L or not, no one hurts my Mells!"

"What if he doesn't? Should I be insulted that he doesn't think I'm hot enough, since he's actually dating me?" Mello asked.

Light could see his reasoning. Whatever L did, it couldn't be good enough. Either way, Mello ended up with some sort of bad thing. Or L cheated on him, or he wasn't hot enough—Light knew Mello was the kind of person that worried about the second one too.

"Just stop thinking about it Mells, I swear to God..." Matt huffed agitated.

They were silent, Near working on Mello's face and hair, apparently, but they still didn't get to see him. Then Near broke the silence, saying: "done. Now it's your turn for the clothes." And he moved away.

Everyone gasped—besides L.

Mello's hair hadn't changed much, Near had just brushed his bangs sideways, to give him a more girly hairdo. He'd put on a dark eyeliner—Mello's eyes were more radiant then ever—and black mascara. Near had also given him light-golden eye-shadow, but not to much. His eyes glowed magically—though he was seriously pissed off. Matt zoomed in on the lips, and they could vaguely hear him say: "wauw, they're even more kissable now!" and they had to admit he was right. Mello's lips were naturally plump and pink, but with the lip-gloss they were even more so.

Matt zoomed out again, and passed the camera to Near. Mello scowled.

"Okay, now, the clothes!" They walked over to the closet, and Matt guided Mello inside, giving him the first outfit. "Come on, try it on," Mello growled, slipping inside. "Don't make me make you!" Matt threatened.

Near filmed as Mello closed the door, locking himself inside the closet, so he could change. When he came out, they gasped again, but Mello didn't seem pleased at all.

"I look like a pie!"

"It has its appeal, definitely with L!"

Mello was wearing a wide, red dress, that was tight around his sides. He did look edible—but in the you're-hot-way. Not the you-look-like-pie-way. Matt waved at Mello to indicate that he should change again, and Mello disappeared, throwing out the loathed dress seconds later.

"I look so cheap!" Mello yelled, not being too happy about the new outfit either.

"Show!" Matt replied, and Mello emerged.

He looked cheap. But everyone at headquarters was close to getting a nosebleed, so cheap can't be bad.

The skirt reached right under his ass—they could see a bit of his underwear—and the top had a deep cut—too deep to be actually proper. Matt had forced him to wear red heals with this outfit, and they made his ankles seem more slender. But yeah, he looked cheap.

"I don't think L likes cheap," Matt said pensively. "Change."

Mello grunted something about L not liking girls anyways, but they chose to ignore it.

"This will be the best one—the others were for teasing." Matt whispered.

And indeed, this time Mello didn't complain. The skirt reached it bit above his knee, but didn't show anything, and fit him well. It swirled a bit when he moved, and was made from a simple white fabric. His top had special butterfly-sleeves, and fitted perfect around his waist. A bit of lace from the white bra that Matt had made him wear (so they could stuff in some fake boobs) was showing, but it wasn't slutty, since the top was black-white, and the lace just edited to the picture. He was wearing different heels, this time they were black and glossy, and rather high.

Matt nodded in approval, and got up, a small plastic bag in his hand. When Mello saw Matt was coming over, he panicked a bit.

"Matt, what are you... AH!" He screamed as Matt pushed him inside the closet, coming in too. "NO! Matt! NO! I'm not wearing that! GET IT OFF! Don't touch me there! HELP! NEAR!"

But Near just kept on filming until the image went black.

Misa frowned at Light—she didn't understand what they were looking at. Light wondered what had been in the bag. Matsuda wondered if L would hit on girl-Mello. All in all, people wondered things.

New images appeared and their minds went blank, like the screen had been seconds before.

"And?" Near asked.

He was carrying the camera again, filming Matt, who was typing on his computer. They could see that he was looking at security tapes of the building they were in.

"Yeah, L's there. Plan Girly-Mello, starts now." And the camera shut off again.

The next images were from a hidden camera, at least, Light thought, since it filmed straight ahead and no one stared oddly. Light assumed they would've if someone walked in there with a normal camera.

Near was walking up to L—he was the one with the hidden camera—and as he came closer, L focussed on him. He was by the food-table, a plate of cake in his hand. He looked nice, in an actual tuxedo.

"Hello," Near greeted and L smiled. "How are you?"

"It's good to see you again Near, it's been a while. I'm fine, thank you," he outstretched his hand, assumingly petting Near's head. "Have you seen Mello and Matt?"

"No, actually I haven't," Near turned and they could see Mello in disguise next to him. He—or she—was patting her foot in a very Mello way. "This is Jennifer," Near indicated Mello. "She's a friend of ours."

"Very nice to meet you." L shook Mello's hand heartedly, and Near suddenly excused himself and the view changed—now it was filmed with a security camera—they knew because an hour was reflected in red letter in the right corner—one that Matt controlled.

They saw 'Jennifer' and L talk, and then stared perplex as they started dancing together, waltzing across the floor. They couldn't hear much besides the music, and didn't know what the two were talking about. There were a lot of other people too, looking up at L every now and then—there weren't a lot adults, all were kids or teenagers, except for Watari and Roger, who were talking and glancing at L and girl-Mello.

"Mello'll be so pissed," They heard Matt say, and it was obvious he had his microphone on, so they could hear his reactions to the footage he too was watching. "He's actually dancing with someone who he thinks isn't Mello!"

"Yeah. I can't believe this. L doesn't dance—well, he didn't before he was with Mello. And he doesn't dance with anyone besides Mello either—though they don't much, to not raise assumptions, but now he's waltzing with a girl he only met?" Near sounded truly disappointed.

"It's not good."

The two continued dancing, and for a second, the screen went grey, but then showed the same ballroom again. In the right corner an hour told them it was five hours later, and then the pair stopped dancing. They talked some more, and with their hands entwined, they left the room.

"Matt, quick, they're leaving! Search them!" A map appeared on the screen, with a red light buzzing—the red light was Mello.

"Erm, it seems that they're..." Matt waited as the red dot moved up a set of stairs, according to the map. Then he said in disbelieve: "Are they going to L's room?"

"I think so... oh God, Mello will not be happy. Show the room."

And L's bedroom came in sight. The one they'd seen before, with the double bed, and the drawers and the desk and the laptop. They didn't have to wait very long until the door opened. L and 'Jennifer' entered, and Matsuda tensed. He'd seen Mello pull a gun for less than a cheating boyfriend. L was in serious danger.

Mello didn't move when L closed the door, and they could see his eyes blazing. L didn't seem to notice as he outstretched his hand to touch 'Jennifer's face.

"Don't touch me," Mello growled and L froze. "Don't fucking touch me, you bastard!"

L blinked and opened his mouth, but Mello interrupted: "I cannot believe you! Something in a _skirt_ talks to you and you take it to your bedroom!"

"Mello I—"

"Oh, you finally get it!" Mello yelled, and batted L's hand—that was still just hanging there—away.

"No, wait..." L protested.

"You're such an unbelievable mother-fucker! You bag of shit! Seriously! For a fucking _skirt_?" He ranted on, pacing the floor.

"No, Mello, I..."

"What!" Mello glared angrily at him. "I didn't suffice and you just take a fucking girl, that you've know for less than a day to your bedroom to fu—"

L interrupted him harshly: "MELLO! I knew it was you all along!"

"As if!" Mello stilled, voice cold.

"You're not that different Mello." L protested, approaching Mello, and he wiped away the eyeliner with his thumb.

"Not that different! I'm wearing a skirt and have boobs!"

L shook his head, and let a hand glide through Mello's hair to fix his bangs. Then he took his chin in his hand and connected their lips.

"No one tastes like you do." He whispered, and rubbed Mello's cheek with his nose in a hopeful way.

Matsuda hoped L had better prove then that—he probably wasn't lying, but Mello wouldn't believe him that easily, he could tell. Light thought L was speaking the truth, and that he seemed sorry that he hadn't told Mello right away that he knew it was him.

"You didn't know that before!" Mello growled, trying to get away from the older man.

"No, but there's only one person in the world that smells like you—cacao and something spicy." L said, and nuzzled Mello's neck to prove his point.

"You..." Mello didn't say anything more.

L let his hands slide under the top, and lifted it over his head, then undid the lace bra.

"Ridiculous as both items are—it's still quite obvious that it's you." L said, his hand on Mello's hip and petting his tan stomach with his thumb.

It was funny to see Mello like that—half-naked, without boobs, but with a skirt, high heels and pale stocking. Mello put his hand on his other hip in protest.

"No one noticed." He tried, still not being sure.

"No one would. But I do." L kissed Mello's neck, cradling them slowly in his arms, as if he was trying to make all the bad insecurities go away.

"But what if you're lying?" Mello wondered aloud, looking down at the man who stopped kissing him.

"I'm not," L promised, straightening his back. "Mello, come on. I actually _danced_ with you. Do you really think I'd ever want to dance with anyone else? And no one but you, Watari and Roger have ever been in this room. I wouldn't flirt with anyone else, Mello, come on. Why would I?" He softly petted Mello's cheek. "You're all the perfection I can handle."

Mello looked at his feet, and when he looked up again, he kissed L full on the lips. Matsuda inwardly squealed. Who knew L could be such a charmer? When they separated, Mello murmured: "I'm still killing Near and Matt."

"Why?" L asked tipping his head to the side a bit. Light wondered why too. Everything was good, right? He hadn't been flirting with other people, and he still thought Mello was hot—whoehoe. Though not really.

Mello lifted his skirt, revealing his white, tight short that clung around his thighs, and... lace?

"Matt forced me to wear a garter—and Near didn't help me out."

L laughed a real-heartily laugh—one that was rare on L—and bent through his knees, looking up daringly as he softly touched the fabric to undo the stockings.

"Matt, shut it off." Near's voice ruined the peaceful, romantic moment. Matsuda felt like yelling at the pale boy.

"Oh, come on! They're gonna have hot-almost-sex sex! I wanna watch! Mello and L naked is best porn ever!"

Matsuda, Light, Aizawa and Mogi agreed. L did too, but he didn't let it show. Monitor-L and Mello started kissing again, both bending through their knees, though Mello's were almost obscenely spread, so L could still take the stockings off.

"No, Matt, shut it off now! Mello will kill you!" Near interrupted again. Mello's hands started taking off L's jacket.

"But they're getting to the—oh, fine but—" and the screen went black.

Matsuda made a small sound of protest, and Aizawa nodded in agreement, but none of the others noticed.

They saw Near prick at a tomato that lay next to his bacon, and then look up.

"Matt, why are you filming me while I'm trying to eat?" He asked, before plopping the tomato between his pale lips and in his mouth.

"I dunno. You're sorta cute." Matt said.

Near rolled his eyes, and looked away. Suddenly his eyes widened.

"What?" Matt asked, and turned the camera, following Near's gaze. He gasped.

Mello was coming to them, and at first sight nothing seemed out of place—except for his trousers. His usual leather pants were replaced by black tight-jeans. His waistcoat was the same as always. But... the shoes. He was wearing the high heels he'd been wearing on the Christmas party—the night before—and it was evident that he was also wearing the pale stockings. They could see the white fabric by his feet. All the kids in the cafeteria stared perplex as he click-clacked his way over to Matt and Near, but they didn't dare to laugh—they probably knew about the gun.

Mello flopped down next to Near, stealing a piece of bacon as if he wasn't wearing high-heals and stocking.

"Mells... why are you—" Matt began, but Mello glared, and took a French fry.

"I lost a bet." He snarled, not happy with himself, in the least.

Near looked somewhat sympathetically at his friend, and offered him his plate, so Mello could eat as much as he wanted. Mello grinned happily and took a tomato between his fingers.

"What bet? With L?" Matt asked, setting the camera down, so it filmed the table and all three of them were visible.

"Yeah," Mello pouted. "But it really wasn't fair—I wish I would've thought about something like that."

Matt frowned, fixing his goggles, and Near tipped his head in question.

"Erm... what was the bet exactly?" Matt questioned.

"None of your business! Perv!" Mello yelled suddenly.

He pushed the plate back to Near and got out a bar of chocolate instead. Matt's eyes widened.

"I'm not a perv! I was just...—oh. It was one of those." He grinned in understanding.

Near didn't seem to get it—neither did the people at headquarters.

"No!" Mello starting blushing suddenly, and L smiled his peculiar smile. Light glanced at him—what could it be? "No it wasn't!"

Matt's grin grew.

"Come on now Mells," he cooed teasingly. "Tell Mattie what you did."

Mello's blush stayed evident as he bent over to whisper in Matt's ear. Matt's eyes grew, and when the blonde sat down again, he swore: "Goddamit! I knew I should've watched!"

"Oh, but I'll get him back for it!" Mello scowled, loosing his blush a bit. "No man makes me walk around in high-heals and gets away with it—so you two beware—and definitely not because of... that!" Mello frowned, licking the corner of his chocolate. "I can't help it his hands make me... pff." He ended with an irritated huff, and Matt grinned, patting Mello's shoulder.

Matsuda really wanted to know what the bet had been about, and he was about to turn towards L, when a new scene played.

"Here's the 'kiss the booboo's' part of Can't spell family without L!" A mature Matt said cheerily. "Enjoy the cuteness!"

Small Mello ran into the room, a haze of black and blonde, spurting over to the sofa. L and Matt were playing videogames, and Matt looked up as his blonde best friend halted in front of them.

"A box bit me!" Mello screeched, holding out his arm, which was scratched by the elbow.

"A box bit you?" Matt's mouth opened in a surprised O.

"A box bit me!" Mello repeated, hopping up and down.

"Let's kill it!" Matt declared, and ran off.

Mello went to follow him, but L yanked at the back of his shirt, nearly making the boy trip back.

"What?" Mello asked innocently, turning to the older man.

L took his arm gently and looked at the scratch.

"We should put some disinfectant on it. Does it hurt?" He asked, worried.

"A bit... but with the disinfectant it will hurt even more! Can't you just make it go away?" Mello's eyes were big, and tears started to gleam in them—it was only now that he noticed how much it really hurt.

L frowned. Then he planted his lips onto the wound, softly kissing Mello's elbow. Mello's eyes widened.

"Here. All better." L smiled, and Mello grinned.

"Thank you!" He chirruped, and fell between L's legs to hug the man around his torso. Then he ran off the way Matt had gone.

Seven-year-old Matt was on his back, arms and legs outstretched, in his red swim trunks, with his goggles a bit crocked on his face. Mello entered the picture, in his black swim trunks, pulling L with him.

"Here he is! Fix him, L! He's in pain!" Mello sat down on his knees next to Matt.

L frowned.

"What happened?" He asked, dropping down too.

"He fell flat on his stomach in the water!" Mello squealed, voice high since he was so concerned about his friend.

Matt moaned in pain. L looked a bit uncertain—how to fix painful stomachs? But then, as Mello had expected, he pressed his lips down on the red spot above Matt's navel.

"Better?"

Matt nodded lightly.

"Maybe you should do it again?" Mello asked, eyes big as he looked up at L hopefully.

L repeated his earlier motion, and Matt smiled, murmuring: "thank you. I'm better now." And Mello flung down to hug his best friend.

Older-Matt's voice said: "I know you think we're just profitin' from L's good heart, but it's not true! L's kisses have healing power!" He tried to sound defending, but didn't quite succeed.

"It hurts, it hurts, it HURTS!" Young Mello whined, and L tried to shush him as he investigated Mello's petite finger, to see if he'd missed something.

"It's gone now, don't worry," L looked at the splinter of wood that was now resting in his palm. "Wauw, that's really big," Mello's eyes widened, and filled with tears. "How the hell did that..." L stopped when he noticed he was being a bit insensitive, and quickly hugged the small boy. "Oh, don't cry, I'm sorry! Is it better now?"

The blonde shook his head, pouting.

"It hurts." He said silently.

L smiled and kissed the pinky.

"How 'bout now?"

"Now it's good." Mello smiled too.

Headquarters smiled, even brighter than Mello. They were so adorable!

Mello's knee was scratched and L planted his lips to it. They were on a bench, in a hospital or something alike, and Mello's head was in a bandage. No one moved, then L turned to the boy, and kissed his head sweetly. Matt's thumb had a Mario-sticker around it, and he asked L to kiss it better—which he did. Mello was on a chair, and suddenly fell off without an apparent reason. In two seconds flat L was by his side to give him some magic kisses.

"You're probably wondering why there aren't any booboo films of Near," Matt's voice said suddenly, while L kissed kid-Matt's cheek, that was swollen. "Well, Near's the easy, 'I'm-gonna-sit-here-all-day-with-my-leg-tucked-up-and-make-white-puzzles-upside-down'-person. He doesn't really move a lot unless Mells and me make him. So, he doesn't walk into stuff," Mello bumped into the glass door, and there was L, to the rescue! "No boxes bite him and he doesn't really fall off crap either. So I guess that makes him a lucky bastard. Though... Mello and me are luckier, since we got ourselves L-loving!" L planted his lips first on Mello's broken arm, then on Matt's. "Which... in principle makes Mello the luckiest bastard on earth, since he gets L-loving without having a booboo... but, whatever. Back to the booboo-films!"

Matt was in the hospital—his green tunic was tucked up to reveal two small scars, he'd had appendicitis. His goggles were around his neck, and he pouted at Mello. L smiled and kissed both of the scars, and Matt huged him gratefully. Mello pecked Matt's cheek.

L was cutting vegetables, suddenly cutting his finger. He swore loudly, and Matt and Mello, who were sitting on the kitchen island, shared a look, before jumping off and stopping in front of the man. He stopped sucking on his hurt finger when he saw them looking up at him with feral eyes. Mello pulled at his arm, and took his hand. He brought the still bleeding finger to his lips, making a face at the metallic taste, and then gave L's hand to Matt, who kissed the finger too.

"Better?" They said together, and L rolled his eyes, ruffling their hair with the good hand.

Matt was running around, doing salto's when Mello yelled: "Mattie watch out!" and as he straightened up, Matt frantically ran into the wall. He waggled a bit, then fell down on his bum. L came in, and seeing the boy on the floor, he went over to him, panicking.

"Matt? Are you okay?" He dropped down next to the boy, seeing the bump on his forehead grow. Matt looked at him through his goggles, eyes a bit in shock. "We should get you to the nurse."

"No!" The boy objected. "I don't like the nurse! You fix it!"

"Okay, okay," he kissed Matt's head and helped the boy up. He frowned as the redhead nearly tipped over again. "Right... one for luck." He kissed him again.

"L," Matt said hesitantly, and L nodded, taking his hand to make sure he didn't fall over. He blinked. "Can you make my bum better too?"

L's eyes widened.

Matsuda tried to hide his snickers—he had been trying for a while now. Light smiled—he couldn't help it. Normally he thought kids were annoying, but these were kind of cute. Misa squealed, and L would've glared at her, but he was looking at the next image. The others returned their attention too.

Mello was sixteen and in a hospital bed. L was on a chair next to it. But the scene didn't move. Suddenly Matt's voice said: "to finish up the booboo-section, I sought out the best booboo. Or, the worst... depends on who you are in the picture. Maybe a word of explanation: about two years back Mello got shot by this stupid prick—don't worry, we got 'em back good. And well, he sorta nearly died. I hacked the hospital security tapes, and I found this. It takes place about ten minutes after I left the room. But, future grandkids, don't tell Mells I showed you—he don't like the sentimental shit."

And the image started moving. Mello opened one eye, staring at L without emotion.

"You're not going to scold at me?" Mello asked softly.

"I did not blow off a mission and flew 24hours straight so I could scold at you Mello." L said sternly, getting off his chair.

He walked over to the bed, sitting down by the blonde's feet. Looking at the boy intensely, he asked: "how do you feel?"

"I'm fine." Mello said bitterly, closing his eye again.

"You lie." At this Mello opened both his eyes, glaring.

"Okay. My ribs feel as if they're pocking right through my lungs, and I think they left the bullet 'cause it feels like it's burning a hole through my chest." He turned his head, and L sighed—though it wasn't audible.

He crawled over to Mello, lying down next to him in the small bed, and Mello immediately buried his face in L's t-shirt. L carefully petted Mello's back, which was showing a bit because of his hospital-gown. He rubbed soothing circles and made shushing sounds in Mello's ear as the boy shook with silent sobs.

"It's okay Mello." L said softly against his hair, but the blonde shook his head.

"No it's not," he whispered, and sobbed again. "I risked Matt's life too—and you, you had to come all the way over here, just 'cause I was stupid enough to get shot!"

"It wasn't your fault Mello," L pulled the boy closer, and he clamped onto the white shirt as if he'd die without. "And you know Matt is okay, like you'd even be able to tell him _not_ to come—he would follow you to the end of the world, whether you like it or not," he kissed the boy beneath his ear, and Mello shook one last time. "And I'm sure the pain will go away soon."

"You had to leave your case because of me!"

"Watari can do fine on his own—I wouldn't be able to focus on anything anyways." L replied honestly.

Mello didn't say anything more, but nodded lightly. L kissed his forehead softly. When Mello moved to get more comfortable, he flinched and his eyes widened.

"Mello?" L asked worried, but Mello shook his head, biting his lip. "Where does it hurt?" He pointed at his chest, drawing blood from biting too hard. "Do you want me to make it better again?" And Mello nodded his head fervently.

L kissed him next to his eye, and helped him to half take off the gown, so he could push it down and see Mello's chest. There was a big bandage all around Mello's ribcage and a bit bellow it he had a wound with stitches. There were also stitches near his groin, which was still hidden by the blue-green cloth.

L pressed his lips against the bandage, right above Mello's heart, and the blonde shivered, enjoying the touch. The dark eyes looked up at Mello, and Mello whispered: "the others need healing too."

The man's lips travelled down and kissed his stitches, then the ones at Mello's groin.

"All better." L whispered, and the boy nodded, putting a hand against L's cheek.

He moved up again, wrapped Mello in another hug, and the blonde rolled up close against him. The image stilled.

"Wauw," came Matt's voice. "Talking about kissing the booboo's! Saw the groin one! Mello's a lucky bastard, dammit. Well, I need a cold shower now! Thanks for watching Can't spell family without L, and you'll see me on the next tape!"

And everything went black again. Matsuda thought they'd made progress—they'd gotten a sort of end-title. Which was new. Light leaned back in his chair, thinking about what they'd seen. Soichiro frowned, and L put his knees to his chest, and leaned over to press a couple of buttons. Before anyone could blink, he was opening the files again, and typing away.

Matsuda and Light exchanged glances—_his mood changed_. But they didn't dare to say it out loud. Soichiro motioned for the others to go back to work, and Light pushed Misa off, who huffed and walked out of the door. No one spoke. But Matsuda did keep thinking about what Near had said: _however hard it will undoubtedly be on some people to believe this—I really think L loves Mello._ And he thought that maybe that was what L was thinking about—they'd kept it a secret for so long, and now Watari had found out. They hadn't seen Watari yet, he was still in his room—maybe that was troubling L. Maybe he even felt guilty about not letting Watari now. Or maybe Matsuda was completely loosing it. That could be it too.

**AN: This time, I did reread properly. If there's still mistakes, well, I'll be damned :) And I know: WAUW! An other update in ONE day! Jeez, what she on? But, I figured I owe you guys since the other one took so long. You're gonna have to beg me to update again though, 'cause my exams aren't finished yet, so I'll need lots of stimulating!**


	8. Wherein the kids go mental—

Can't spell family without L: Part eight: wherein the kids go mental—and they appear to be planning something.

**AN: This is dedicated to my all-time Love 'n Huggy Person, misses T! Especially for you: L whines, Mello's in a tub, Light is discussed, and Matsuda pouts!**

**Love, your Misses K ;)**

Light paused. He could clearly hear voices coming from... the closet. There were people talking in the closet? He listened more carefully.

"No! Roger! I don't want to!" He could hear L whine.

He frowned—did L just _whine_?

"He's hiding from me! He's the one that watched me when I was sharing something very personal with Mello! I don't do that to him! _He_ should apologise!" L insisted.

Silence, then: "we were going to! When everything was arranged, and it felt like a right time! You have to understand Roger—Watari is like a father to me! I couldn't just very well tell him I was in love with Mello: he would probably murder me!"

Roger said something back and L sighed deeply.

"I will—in time. You can't make me! I'm L! I don't have to listen to what you say!" He sounded somewhat childish if you asked Light—but then the door opened and he emerged from the hall-closet, face emotionless as always.

He glanced over when he saw Light standing there, who blushed—_great_. Now L would think Light was eavesdropping. Never mind that he was, L just wasn't supposed to know.

"What do you want, Light-kun?" L asked, a bit briskly.

Light bowed his head, continuing his walk to the main room.

"I heard some noises, and just wondered if something was wrong, Ryuzaki."

To his surprise L sighed again, and stopped walking.

"Yes, there is something, actually," he hung his head and Light frowned once more—was L really going to tell him? He looked like he was. "Watari is hiding from me—and although I am a bit upset with him, I don't very much like it."

Light frowned—L was seriously asking him for advice. About Watari. Oh God.

"Well, erm..." Light thought about it, as they entered the main room together. "If you just make him understand that you're no longer angry with him, I'm sure you'll be okay again. I don't think he's mad with you—probably just a little shocked. If you just explain, it'll all be fine."

L nodded, biting his thumb as Light sat down in his chair. He didn't follow though, but instead said: "thank you, Light-kun, I think I'll go talk with him right now."

"What should we do while you're gone, Ryuzaki?" Light asked politely—and a bit hopefully, though it was easily masked.

Matsuda's ears peeked as he heard Light's question—he knew what Light wanted, and wondered if L would cave in.

"Well, I suppose..." L's big eyes rested on Light. "Since you helped me—would you like to watch another tape?"

Before Light could answer, everyone started cheering and Matsuda ran over to L, to hug him from behind. L's eyes widened at the sudden proximity, and he stared as Matsuda let go and flopped down in _L_'s chair, trembling with anxiety.

"Okay... that's a yes, I suppose." And out of nowhere he got out the tapes, putting them on the table.

Light smiled sweetly at the older man.

"Thank you Ryuzaki—and I would once more like to apologise about the earlier... incident."

"It's alright," L turned around, heading out. "Thank you for your help, Light-kun."

Light turned to Matsuda, who was grinning broadly. One word. _Yes_!

Without further interruptions, Light pushed in the tape, and Matsuda hopped up and down in his chair, until Ide slapped him on the head—hard—and he stopped.

"But I don't wanna!" Matt whined—he was eleven, in the bathtub with Mello and Near. He was wearing the orange goggles, glaring at the older man that sat by the side of the tub—by the looks of it, L was trying to wash them properly. "You're such a perv!" Matt accused L with a wet finger covered in foam. "You just want to see young boys naked!"

Mello didn't seem to mind the bath very much—he just sat there, covered with whiteness, hair a bit damp. Near splashed around with a rubber duck until L got to cleaning him—he was only six or so, and as he started playing with his plastic submarine, only his eyes emerged from out of the water, with the tuff of white hair. Mello petted the head sweetly. L rolled his eyes, and started rubbing soap to his sponge. It was a weird sponge. It had black ears, and looked like a panda.

"You just don't want to be washed Matt," L said, and reached in the tub to retract Matt's foot. He squealed and grabbed Mello's leg to keep himself stable. "I let you get away three days ago, but really, Matt, you don't want to be knows as the smelly kid, now do you?"

Matt shook his head fearfully. L started scrubbing his foot.

"Well than, sit still and let me clean you—otherwise Roger will hit you with his cane, and Watari will avoid you because you smell."

Matt pouted a bit and murmured: "I don't want that. But L, you would stay with me, even if I smelled, right?"

L smiled and answered: "no, I wouldn't—I would just make sure you never smell."

At this Matt smiled too, and apologised for calling L a perv. L washed him between his toes, and cleaned his back too, having to reach over and getting his white shirt a bit wet—but he didn't mind. When he was done with Matt, he took a yellow cup from the side, and filled it with water. He carefully held Matt's head back, and let the water run over it, rinsing it without getting the soap in his eyes. Then he moved on to Near, and Matt rested his head against Mello's shoulder, as they started to discuss chocolate.

Near was a lot easier than Matt—he didn't complain once, and let L wash his back and little legs. Though when he was done, he asked quietly: "can I come out now? I don't like water."

L smiled, and reached over for a towel.

"It's okay Near, come here." The boy stood carefully, and L wrapped him in the towel before they were able to see anything—see, he wasn't a perv at all!

Picking up Near he dried him off a bit, ruffling his hair with another towel. Near smiled sweetly at the man, and when L put him down again, he sat down next to him, looking at Matt and Mello. Only Mello hadn't been cleaned yet. When L realised this, his behaviour changed.

His eyes grew a bit wide as he looked at Mello. For a second he seemed dumbstruck, then he suddenly got up, and said, very fast and un-L-like: "oh! I think Watari's calling me!" he went over to the door—he looked nervously at the door. "Yes, that's Watari! I have to go now! I'll tell Roger to finish up!" and left without another word.

Matsuda frowned—he hadn't heard anything. Neither had the kids, apparently.

"Did you hear Watari?" Matt asked Near curiously.

Near shook his head. Mello blinked and suddenly his eyes filled with tears.

"He ran away from me!" He whined, and Matt patted his arm to comfort him. "He doesn't want to wash me! He doesn't love me!" he sobbed. "L hates me now! Am I so hideous!" the whining didn't stop and it was Mello's turn to lean against his best friend. Near offered him a rubber duck to cheer him up. "Why doesn't he want to touch me! He doesn't love me-hee-hee!"

Light shook his head. He didn't think the problem was that L didn't love Mello anymore—quite the contrary, actually.

The bathroom went black. And Mello appeared on the monitor, staring at his own computer-screen—he was about eighteen or so.

"Mells, come on." Matt nudged the boy and his hand came on screen.

"Matt, leave me," Mello shooed Matt, and suddenly Light realised Mello was staring at Light's personal files—had L given those to Mello? "I don't have much time to get these files—the damn Japanese always find out quick if someone's hacking the system."

Light let out a puff of air—apparently L hadn't been sharing information. Though he wondered why Mello was interested in his files.

"Hey," Matt put down the camera, and placed himself behind Mello's chair, staring at the screen as the files loaded. "Isn't that the Yagami-kid. The Kira-percentage?"

"Uhu," Mello nodded, and clicked buttons—the screen of the police page faded away, and only the files remained. A window said 'transfer complete' and Mello clicked it away too. "Matt, do you think he's... good-looking?"

Everyone gasped. Matsuda tipped his head to the side—did Mello think Light was attractive? Light smirked, so Mello thought he was hot, éh? Haha. He laughed maliciously on the inside—but he was actually quite wrong.

"I dunno Mells, he's a typical pretty-boy prep."

Light's mouth dropped. A pretty-boy prep! What an insult!

"I know Matt," Mello sighed, and turned his chair to look at the boy. "But do you think he's attractive?"

"What's this 'bout Mells?" Matt frowned, flopping down onto the bed.

"Do you think L finds him attractive?" Mello whispered sadly.

Matsuda's eyes grew—ah, he was jealous. Light's smile disappeared. He'd already noticed that L didn't find him attractive.

"That's what this is about?" Matt laughed, and Mello glared. "Mells, are you insane! The guy is nothing compared to you! Jesus," Light wanted to kill Matt. "Look at the guy! He's totally asexual! I mean... is it a dude, is it a bird? No good luck mate, he might be both!" Matt continued laughing at his pouting friend. "I mean... okay—he ain't ugly. But he's... dull, Mells. Not to mention, has a Kira-percentage. Yes, L digs maniacs—but only when maniac is you," Mello crossed his arms and huffed at this comment. Light continued to feel the oh-so-strange urge to scratch Matt's eyes out. "And then there's you, Mello, no kidding. You're like a Roman God or something! You have Adonis' features! Not to mention, you're like the proto-type Eromenos," Matt grinned—and Matsuda wondered what the hell 'Eromenos' meant. "You're always like 'oh, everyone wants to be inside L's pants' while all the guys are always trying to sweep you of your feet and carry you to their love-nest for a night of respectably much shagging," Mello rolled his eyes. "Yagami has nothing on you. You're perfect and he's trying to rule the world—it's the closest to perfection he'll ever be, because L is going to arrest his fucking none-existing ass," Light looked down at his bum in shock—was it really none-existing? "Instead of fucking it, so don't be a pouting bitch!"

"Pff," Mello pouted still. "As long as the bastard doesn't try to seduce L 'r something."

"Mells, if L does anything as stupid as even look funny at the Yagami-kid, I shoot him through the head." Matt swore.

"But you can't do that," Mello objected. "It's unethical—shoot Yagami instead!" at this Mello cheered inwardly and Light's eye twitched.

Matt frowned

"So shooting L is unethical, but shooting Yagami is okay?" He asked.

"Indeed—because Yagami isn't sexy and I'm sure he's not able to twist his tongue in that special way L does." Mello nodded happily.

Matt laughed and thumped Mello with his foot, grinning. Matsuda could suddenly envision their bedroom activities all to well—he felt the beginning of a nosebleed; he had photographic memory.

"Perv."

"Doesn't change the undeniable fact that it's the truth." Matsuda laughed, and at that moment L and Watari entered the room—they were talking.

"So shooting L means loosing a great sex-toy?" Matt quirked his eyebrow.

L looked up—hurt and shocked reflecting on his face—but only Light could tell. Matsuda stopped laughing immediately—that was just mean.

"No," Mello frowned, leaning back. "L isn't a sex-toy! That's so barbaric—you just can't shoot him because I love him, and if he dies a piece of me dies, and then you only have half of me, and you don't want that," Matsuda sighed in relief, and L and Watari continued walking, void of feelings again. Light inwardly cursed. "Though his abilities in bed are quite unprecedented too," Watari's eyes grew and they paused again. "So I'm just the luckiest man on earth, and that is that."

"I get it—no shooting the L-dude, and you get the best sex." Matt sighed and fell back onto the bed.

Mello nodded with an air of superiority, he said: "I'm happy you finally understand that Mattie."

Matt just psh-ed, and murmured something.

"What did you need anyway?" Mello asked whilst getting out a chocolate bar.

"Never mind—we've talked about L long enough for today. I'll get back on the tapes tomorrow." And the screen blanked out.

Watari looked at L, who was staring ahead, and nudged his shoulder carefully. L looked a bit awkwardly at him, and they continued heading for the kitchen. The others looked back at the screen.

"I can't believe we're doing this," Mello hissed—he must have been ten. "This is so indecent of us—we're perverts, do you realise that?"

The camera was filming a hallway, and a bit of blonde hair.

"I know, I know—but our grandchildren have the right to see," Matt whispered. "It'll be so cool!"

"He'll kill us."

"Probably," Matt agreed, and they stopped in front of a door. "Do you think he's eaten it by now?"

"'m sure. It's L—no way can he resist a cake." And the door opened.

L was in bed—in a weird position. He was on his back, arms and legs outstretched, snoring quietly. Matsuda grinned—he looked like he was drugged or something and... oh! Was that a bit of drool!

"Okay, it definitely worked—L never snores." Mello whispered and he tiptoed into the view.

"Hurry up and do it Mells, before someone gets us!" Matt followed and they both silently crawled onto the bed, both on a different side.

Mello got out a marker, and handed another one to Matt, who put the camera so it filmed him and Mello, crawling carefully over to L's chest. Mello put his black marker to L's chest and was about to move it, when—

"WHAAH!" The two boys shrieked as L suddenly grabbed them.

Matt tried getting away, but he yanked the boy back by his sweater, and they both fell down on his lap.

"You really think I wouldn't smell the sleep-potion?" L asked, sitting up with the two boys in his lap. "What on earth were you planning?"

Mello and Matt shared a look, and stared at the raven-head, who looked expectantly at the two boys. He pretended that he wasn't in just his underwear, and stared sternly at the small boys.

"We wanted to give you a tattoo," Mello muttered. "Here," he touched L's shoulder, right above his armpit. "You know, just for funs."

"Yeah, with our markers." Matt admitted.

L sighed, and then said: "fine. But no obscene messages, okay?"

The screen went black, and then L was in the bathroom. Still in his boxers and black all over his body. Ide laughed silently. Light stared—he couldn't read what they said.

"I said no obscene messages!" L spluttered in protest, as he read all the things they'd written down on him. Their was a gothic L drawn on his chest, where they'd said they planned on giving him a tattoo, but he also had things on ribcage, sides and shoulders. "'L's my uke-boy'!" He grunted out. "Who wrote that!"

Matt pointed at Mello who grinned—Matsuda's eyes grew, they were insane!

"Why do you even know what that means!" L frowned, reading the other texts. "'Mello's property', 'L-dude', 'life's a bitch, so is L', what on earth..."

"Well, you gave us the opportunity—we just couldn't resist." Mello said cheekily.

"But we'll make it up to you," Matt said, and he gave L the marker. Mello nodded, and they both pulled off their shirts. Monitor-L's eyes widened. So did Light's. They were such nudists. "You can put something on our chests too."

"But no obscenities!" Mello said, grinning widely. "Or we'll rip your shirt in the morning—and than everyone'll know you're our uke-boy."

L glared at them—a rare glare—then pulled Matt closer and started writing.

The screen went black again. Matsuda moaned—why didn't they show them what L had drawn! Okay, it was probably something weird, inside-joke-ish, but still! At that moment Misa Misa entered, immediately placing herself on Light's lap—apparently she could feel it when he wasn't working. Light pushed her aside a bit and...

Then Matsuda squealed again—L was on his seat, working on his computer. He had no clue that there was a half-naked blonde in his room, apparently. Oh, but Matsuda and the others knew. Mello was standing in the doorway, arms crossed in front of his chest. He was wearing black boxer-briefs and a black t-shirt—though, so Light noticed, there seemed to be an odd bulge by his side. L really didn't notice, he had his eyes fixated on the screen.

"I have an idea," Mello said, and L gave a nod. They saw Mello fume, and he walked over to the man. Without a word, he wheeled the chair around, pushed L's legs down, and crawled onto his lap, straddling his sides. L's eyes widened, and he pulled his shirt off over his head—now they could see what the 'bulge' was. "Why don't you open your birthday present?"

L's hands went to Mello's hips, and he laughed—so did Matsuda and the others, besides Misa, who stared furiously at the blonde—Mello was quite inventive. He'd strapped a red ribbon around himself, going over his chest and middle.

"Well," Mello asked innocently. "Don't you want to know what's inside?"

With his weird smile still plastered on his face, L pulled the bow, until the ribbon fell down. He grazed a hand over Mello's side, and the boy purred softly.

"Do you like it?" His eyes were big and blue—and Matsuda wanted to squeal again, though he knew the blonde wasn't nearly as innocent as he pretended to be.

"Very much." L nodded and Mello's smile turned feral, as he slid down the older man's body, back onto the floor.

"Good—I have to warn you though, it's a bit of a frisky gift," he grinned, taking off the older man's shirt. L's eyes widened again. "And it's about to get better," his palm pushed against L's chest, going down. "Because I can go," he reached L's jeans, and his lips attached themselves to his skin. "On," Another kiss and a horse whisper. "All," he pulled down L's zipper with his teeth—which Light found quite remarkable, but Misa glared, and Matsuda made a mental note, trying to remember how exactly he'd done it. "Night," a kiss right above L's boxers, and he crawled up again, straddling L's body once more. "Long." He finished—but a whisper against L's ear.

And the screen went black and everyone swore—Goddammit, that was just not fair! Misa pouted, seeing as even Light was staring intently at the monitor. And then there came a new image, and it was exactly the opposite of what they'd just seen—from husky and come-an-get-me, to sweet and cute and small.

"I drew me!" Matt squealed happily—the three children were on their stomachs on the floor, about seven years old—Near was a lot younger.

"I drew me too." Mello said proudly—Matsuda had to swallow a lump in his throat, it kept on astonishing him how—even though Mello already had a very sexual-vibe around him—small he used to be.

They had pieces of paper scattered around themselves, and crayons and pencils—all the drawing-gear kiddies need. Near was working with a black crayon, and he said: "I drew L."

Mello and Matt frowned, and Mello snatched his picture away.

"Pff! That ain't L!" He giggled and Matt looked too, bursting out laughing.

"Well so what!" Near said defensively—Matt took off his goggles to wipe the tears of mirth from his eyes. "Matt looks like a red monkey and you—I don't know what you're supposed to be, but darn it's ugly."

Mello frowned, staring at his own drawing—Light wanted to see it, oh God, he wanted to mock Mello so badly! But instead he and Matt exchanged a look, and Mello got to his feet.

"Hey! Where are you going?" Near stumbled up too, while Matt grabbed the camera.

"I'll prove that this in no way can be L!" Mello called, waving around the picture, and Near followed him quickly.

First they went to Roger—he was mopping up some dirt in the hallway. He looked up expectantly when he heard footsteps, and Matsuda thought he looked a bit disappointed when he realised it were the kids.

"Hey Roger," Mello purred in his über-sweet voice. "Look at what Near drew! Isn't it nice?"

He held up the picture and Near's cheeks got a bit red. Roger smiled and nodded.

"Very nice gorilla Near, I'm proud." And he petted the boy's head.

Matt howled with laughter and Roger frowned—Near's cheeks got even redder. The blonde started running again, murmuring something about 'hah! L's a gorilla!' between chuckles. Next up came Watari—he looked as if he was in a hurry, actually. Mello hugged him and he bent through his legs, putting Mello on his knee.

"What is it Mello?" He asked sweetly and Mello held up the picture without a word. "Oh, I see," the man smiled, kissing Mello's head and putting him down again. "Very nice liquorish-man—but I really have to go now." He kissed the other boy's cheeks—Near's flaming red—and left.

Near took his picture away—somewhat grumpily—from a grinning Mello, and suddenly L came in view, rounding the corner. The white fluff-ball frowned at Mello and Matt, before breaking into a spurt, heading for L. L looked startled at first, but then he dropped to the floor to catch the running kid in his arms, and picked him up with ease.

"I made this for you L!" Near said happily—Matsuda squealed and Mogi wondered if the child was dumb. If the others hadn't recognised it, surely L wouldn't...—

"Why thank you Near!" L exclaimed, and Mello's mouth dropped. "That looks just like me! I've never been given a beautiful picture like this!"

Near childishly stuck his tongue out to Mello and Matt, while L cuddled him closer, still muttering silent 'thank you's in the boy's hair.

"What the fuck?" Matt groaned. "How did he know?"

"He's a genius," Mello sighed. "I suppose he has his ways."

And then the screen went black again, and Matsuda pouted and sighed in disappointment seconds later.

"I really wonder why they made those things." Light stated, and L and Watari re-entered the room.

"Maybe just to prove how much they like L," Matsuda smiled, and got off L's chair, grinning at the raven-head. "Thank you for letting us watch L-san!"

L sat down, giving a nod, but before he could click any buttons to conjure the files, a high-pitched voice said: "you've got Mello-message! Please forgive us for the interruption!" and the web-cam view appeared again, just like it had weeks ago.

Mello was eating chocolate—in a black pyjama, and he was staring down at a paper. His rosary stuck out a bit from between the buttons on his sleeping shirt. His face was contorted in a look of utter confusion, as he snapped off a piece from his bar.

"Hey, correct me if I'm wrong," he said, without looking up, and they all stared at him. "But does it say 'white, a bow, plus a garter'?"

"Yes, that's correct." L said in monotone.

Mello looked up, chocolate dangling from his lips. Matsuda leaned against Light's chair, wondering what the conversation was about.

"But... L. A bow? As in... a bow on my ass?"

L nodded.

"But that goes on a dress!" The blonde squeaked in exasperation.

Another nod.

"Are you under the impression that I'm wearing a dress!" Mello protested, mouth slightly agape.

On of his hands went to his hip, and he raised his head to look at the man, frowning in obvious disbelief.

"Well, one of us has to." L reasoned, putting his thumb to his lip.

"I'm not wearing a bloody dress! I'm not girly!"

"Neither am I." L frowned.

"You're more girly than I am!"

"Am not! You have a girly figure."

"You have girly fetishes—with all the sweets." Mello pointed accusingly at the man—Light wondered what on earth they were fighting about. Why were they trying to prove who was more girly?

"You eat chocolate all the time, which is more girly," L bit back. "And, you have girly eyelashes."

"You have girly legs."

"Yours are more girly."

"Goddammit!" Mello swore. "I'm not wearing a dress because you top! It does not make me a girl!"

"But it's tradition." L tried to reason with the boy.

"Fuck tradition," Mello glared. "I have a penis and I'm not pretending otherwise!" He leaned back. Matsuda snickered. "But, if you promise to wear shoes I'll put a bow on my pants and wear a garter."

L gnawed at his lip, pondering it. Light looked at him—Mello's eyes were also fixed on the man.

"If they can be sneakers, you only have to wear the garter—but it has to be a white one."

"Why?" Mello asked curiously.

"Well, since your underwear will have to be white," he began as if it wasn't obvious. "Because otherwise they'll see it through the white fabric of your pants—it should be white too."

"It's a deal—though yours have to be boxer-briefs."

"Why?" L rumpled his nose as if he'd smelled something foul. "Boxers are more comfortable."

"Yeah—but you in boxer-briefs is hotter." Mello grinned, and L sighed.

"Fine—I can't believe we're making compromises over what we're wearing." He said with some disdain.

"You started it!" Mello objected. "A dress!"

"It's tradition!"

"Well, if you wanted a dress you should've picked some girl." Mello stuck out his tongue.

"But I don't want some girl—I want you."

"Good—otherwise Matt would fuck you up very badly—but that does sort of rule out a dress."

"I just thought—you already wore a dress once, maybe you'd do it again." Mello glared at him—his steel glare-of-impendent-and-painful-doom and snarled: "we are not to speak of the dress-incident every again!"

"Alright, alright," L gave him a little smile. "Don't forget the garter."

"I wouldn't dare," Mello gave him a perky look and then waved a kiss. "Bye! 'love you."

"I love you too." And Mello disappeared.

Light looked at L—a garter, a dress, white?—he wanted to know what it was all about, but one resolute look of said sugar-addict made him swallow and shut his mouth. Matsuda pouted a bit before returning to his seat.

**AN: Ooh. What on earth would they be up to? Oo Oh, next up is more Mello-L goodness**


	9. Where they take a wrong tape—

Can't spell family without L: Part nine: where they take a wrong tape—but L doesn't see so he doesn't protest.

Three weeks later, Matsuda was dying. And he also wanted to kill L. He hadn't given them a second to breathe in fourteen days! The bastard. No to mention, they hadn't _watched a tape_ for fourteen days. It was making Matsuda quite depressed—the others felt it too, how dull the world was without the kids ranting, or the blonde trying to get inside L's jeans, and L letting him.

"Listen," L said suddenly, and he closed the files on his computer. Watari came in, carrying socks and sneakers, and wearing his jacket. "Watari and I have some things to do—but I want you all to stay here. Take a rest if you want to, but I don't think we'll be gone all day. So I want you to be fit when we get back."

"Where are you going, Ryuzaki?" Light asked curiously.

"That's not relevant, Light-kun." L got up, taking the sneakers Watari gave him. The man was smiling brightly—now it wasn't odd to see Watari happy. But he was _really_ happy.

Soichiro frowned once, but then L gave them a nod, and left with Watari. Everyone stared at each other dumbfounded.

"Well," Matsuda began after five minutes of silence—he tried to sound fake-hesitant, but the excitement rang through his voice. "I say we watch a tape."

"We shouldn't watch a 'Can't spell family without L' one though," Light said, thinking, inwardly forming an evil, perverted scheme. "I'm sure L wants to see those too—we should watch one of those that don't have a number."

"Oh yes," Matsuda nodded in agreement—Soichiro frowned slightly. "L won't mind that—and than later we can watch another one with L—one of the 'Can't spell family without L' ones!"

Inwardly Matsuda was screaming his ass off, thinking all sorts of perverted thoughts. But it wouldn't do to share his ideas with his team-mates, since they were rather… dirty. He coughed slightly, and felt a blush stain his cheeks.

Everyone nodded in agreement. Light inwardly cheered—hiding his excitement—and took one of the tapes without a number, which L had left nicely on his desk, and put it in. They all turned to the screen in enthusiasm, wondering what today's tape would reveal about L's past.

There was L's bed, with a tuff of blonde sticking out from under the black sheet, and L's face, on the other's shoulder. They heard a little mewling sound. L's eyes shot open.

"Not now Mello—'m tired." He grunted, and closed them again. Mello murmured something, and there was another mewl.

The blonde turned groggily, muttering: "stop purring, 'm too tired."

L's eyes opened again, sleep-clouded, and he looked at the other.

"I thought it was you."

"Huh?" Mello's face appeared—only his forehead and his eyes, sleepily staring at L.

"It sounded like you." L explained, and yawned slightly.

Mello grunted and L put his head against the boy's shoulder again. They looked pretty comfortable when: "MROW!" L's face ruffled into an unhappy scowl, but Mello's eyes widened.

"Alistair?" He asked suddenly—more mewling.

"What on earth is an alistair?" L's frown grew, and suddenly something jumped onto the bed.

L felt the movement by his feet, and his eyes shot open—they widened considerably at seeing the source of the awful mewling.

"She's a stray cat me and Matt found," Mello explained, as the tiger-striped cat happily bounced over to him, flattering his head against the boy's bare chest. "But Matt said he'd look out for her—he's the one that brought her into Wammy's."

"There's a cat on my bed," L scowled as the animal attracted Mello's attention again—Matsuda laughed, he was obviously jealous. "I don't like it. Make it go away."

Mello chuckled, crawling—rather catlike himself—out from under the blankets, only in his black boxers with the rosary around his neck. He took Alistair from the bed, petting the cat softly on her head.

"Okay, now here's the thing, Ali, you're gonna have to go back to Mattie," Mello nuzzled the cat behind her ear, and she purred happily in his arms. "Don't run into things, and don't get caught—just find the redheaded gamer, okay Ali?" With that he opened the door, gave her a last stroke, and put her in the hallway.

The blonde ran over to the bed, diving under the covers again. He immediately nuzzled closer to L, safely wrapped in the nest of blankets.

"Problem solved." Mello muttered happily against L's lips, before pecking them sweetly.

"You talked to the cat," L said, dumbstruck. "What on earth happened when I was gone? Have you lost your ability to think?"

"No," Mello ignored the insult and cuddled closer. "She's just a very smart cat—now didn't you want to sleep?"

L hummed softly, before he gave a little nod. He closed his eyes, and started pushing the boy away without a word.

"Hey, what..." L pushed him to the side of the bed, and pointed to the bathroom. Mello frowned.

"Go wash your hands before you fall asleep." The older man offered as an explanation.

"What?" Mello's mouth fell open slightly, as L continued his pushing. Eventually he gave up on protesting and stood, tapping his foot fiercely as he waited for the man to explain properly.

"You touched a cat," L said, not looking up. "Wash your hands."

"Excuse me? It's not a dirty cat!" Mello protested. "We've bathed her and stuff!"

"You're covered in cat-germs!" L opened one eye and fixed it on the blonde. "Actually... I think it's better if you go take a shower."

"Okay! That's it!" He stormed into the bathroom—they assumed he was going to wash himself. But then he called angrily: "you're on a Mello-hiatus!"

L opened both his eyes at the comment, looking at the door.

"What's that?"

No reply, though they heard some noises, obviously coming from the raging blonde. When he emerged he had pulled on a shirt, and was carrying a—Light giggled—toilet-bag.

"Mello, where are you going?" the boy glared. "I didn't tell you to leave," the other insisted, abandoning the bed and following as Mello stormed over to the door, about to extend the room. "I just don't like cats—not even yours."

With a last glare of painful-doom, Mello opened the door and said: "Mello-hiatus starts from now!" and the monitor went black.

Matsuda muttered something about the cat, but then there was another image and he shut his mouth.

The tape appeared to be made in some alley—though if they looked closer, they'd see it was just by the back of a building. There were trees in the distance, but it was evening, so they couldn't see much further than the trees. The blonde was leaning against the wall, hood up since it was raining.

"Oh please," Mello muttered, a cigarette between his lips. He got out his lighter, protecting the fire from the wind with his hands. "That's absolute rubbish—L doesn't do shit like that," he took a drag, and glared at the redhead—they figured it was the stalking camera, to which they'd paid no mind. They couldn't fully see Matt, but saw a bit of his red hair. "If he'd do that, his cover would completely be blown."

"That's what I heard Mells," Matt shrugged. "I'm just saying..."

"He ain't stupid—why on earth would he tell the Kira-percentage that he's L?" Light realised with shock that they were talking about him—again, Goddammit. Mello puffed out some blue smoke, and touched his lip lightly with his thumb. He seemed thoughtful, and as he put the cigarette back to his mouth he muttered: "unless... well, of course, it's obvious."

"Huh? It ain't obvious to me Mells, care to share?" They saw the redhead take Mello's fag, obviously bringing it to his own lips.

"If he gets killed now, Yagami has to be Kira—since he's the only suspect that knows L's identity," Mello took back his cigarette. "He's gotta be pretty damn sure—otherwise he wouldn't do that."

"So the Yagami-kid is Kira?" Matt asked.

Mello frowned and Light sighed deeply. Matsuda glanced at him, shrugging slightly.

"L'll know soon enough—keep your panties on Mattie." With a last drag the image turned blank again.

Light was sort of fuming on the inside—he realised this, and that the fuming was very unnecessary was totally not the point! But he didn't want to draw attention to himself, so he fixated on the monitor, waiting for another image.

L was hunched, leaning over and blocking the view—they were back in his room, and there was a blonde sitting in his chair—on his desk stood a bottle with disinfectant, and some clean cloths. There were also some cloths that were—to Matsuda's horror—stained with a rather big amount of blood. The raven-head leaned over to get some more disinfectant on the cloth, and they saw him frown.

"I don't understand why you keep on going back." L said softly.

Seconds later he turned the boy's face to the light, and a bruised Mello came in view—they all gasped.

"It's the only church in town L," Mello tried to explain, as L tended to his wounds—the black eye had a yellow colour, and his lip was split, swelling up. "And you know I can't beat them in a place of God."

"Why didn't you call me?" L concentrated on his sore cheek, pushing the cloth to the deep cut.

"They kicked my cell-phone away—and if I would've kicked the one man he could've fallen badly with his head against one of the benches and then he could've passed away." The boy muttered and then shrieked when L pushed the cloth against his forehead, but L put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"I will come with you tomorrow." He said and Mello nodded.

They watched as L continued taking care of the young boy, and then laid him to sleep in his own bed, hugging the blonde before he curled up in a protective ball, huddling deeper under the blankets.

In the next shot they knew immediately where they were—an old church, light falling through the spotted windows. There were three men, apparently already waiting for the blonde as said boy walked down the aisle.

"Ah, there's our little religious-whore," one of them mocked—they looked almost twenty, with broad shoulders and one had a tattoo on his arm. "We were waiting for you."

"Leave me alone." Mello snarled—and Matsuda was proud, because his voice would've sounded strained and week, but Mello's was strong and loud.

"Now, now, haven't we been through this already?" Another man asked. "The more you protest the more it'll hurt Sweetheart." He purred out the last word, and Mello pushed passed him, going up to the front rows.

Before he could take place, the third man grasped him and wheeled him around—Mello struggled in his grasp, but didn't kick or bite or anything—he just tried to get away. The second man started undoing Mello's belt, and everyone gasped. They knew the men had hurt Mello before but not that...

"You know squirming doesn't work with us, so stop it." One of them growled, and Mello moved his arms about, trying to pry the man's hands off his body.

Just when Mello seemed to become really desperate—Light could tell, because he stopped his movements, and grasped on to his rosary instead, though his legs kept kicking about—L entered the image, going down the aisle. Before the men even noticed they were flying across the room, bumping into walls—now they'd seen L in action before, but it was quite a different thing when it wasn't with Light, and when he was clearly very pissed off. He broke the third man's nose, and grunted: "if you ever come near this boy again," he took Mello in his arms. "I promise that I'll personally hunt you down and kill you very painfully—and don't think I'm joking, you don't touch my family and get away with it!"

They heard the distant sounds of a police-car, coming closer—apparently L had warned them—and two cops came in, arresting the men—one of the police gave L a clear nod when they left again, and the church became silent, as if they'd never even been there to begin with. The only sign that anything out of the ordinary had happened were Mello's stained cheeks and his undone belt and pants. L sat down, placing the blonde in his lap as he cradled him softly. Mello hiccupped helplessly, wrapping his small arms around L's form.

"Mello," L asked quietly, and he went to redo Mello's buckle. "Did this," he meant the unbuttoning-of-the-pants. "Happen before."

Mello sniffled and then nodded, burying his head in L's shoulder. Matsuda sobbed too—so _dramatic_. Light frowned and Aizawa was slightly shocked—they'd...

"Why didn't you tell me Mello?" L asked, holding the boy close again.

"It's—" he hiccupped again. "It's a sin. I thought if I didn't mention it, God wouldn't have to punish me for it."

"Mello, you didn't want this, right?" The boy shook his head fiercely, and L petted his blonde hair. "Well than, it's not _your_ sin. You won't be the one punished for this."

"But, I did something wrong." Mello said sadly and L frowned.

"What do you mean?"

"Why would God let them do that to me, if I haven't done something wrong? Is it because I'm evil?" He asked upright.

"Of course not—you're not evil," L exclaimed. "Sometimes things like this just happen—it's not because it's your fault."

"Do you think it's because God thinks I might be gay?" he sniffled again, and L wiped away the tears that were streaming down his cheeks—it was odd, though he was crying hard, he made no obvious noises. "Maybe He thought he was doing me a favour?" Mello looked up and L smiled.

"I doubt that Mello," L said. "Actually I'm sure that He will make it up to you later—it's over now, so try not to think about it too much."

"But—if I turn out to be gay... do I go to hell?" Mello asked—it was obvious he'd been bothered with it, and Light thought he might know _why_.

"Of course not—I know some religions believe that," L got up, carrying Mello still. "But if He'd send you to hell just for falling in love, it wouldn't be God. God is kind, and you will be forgiven."

"Even if I fall in love with a boy?"

L nodded and Mello put his head against the man's shoulder again—they could hear him sigh contently, and Matsuda too, thought he might know what was in his head.

From the church—with the large set of doors and the impressive windows, the screen jumped immediately to a living room—with chairs, two sets of couches and a large television. Mello was on the sofa, nipping off his chocolate bar, next to L. L looked rather funny, legs pulled up as always, plate on his knees as he wiggled his toes slightly.

"I'm going to hell for this—but maybe I'm not because you said He'd make it up to me." The blonde ranted, not even seconds after the image appeared—Light figured he was referring to the earlier footage.

L frowned, looking up from the cake he was eating. Mello tucked his legs up, and L tipped his head in question.

"I know we're family—and it's really bad," the young boy continued. "Because you don't feel that way, and dammit, I'm really going to hell but you said I wouldn't, so here goes," he inhaled deeply, and L stopped eating—he looked a bit in distress, as if worrying about Mello's mental health. "I'm in love with you."

Matsuda squealed—and the others didn't even think about glaring his way, because they all wanted to squeal too—even if they were guys, and guys can't squeal because then they loose their manliness. L didn't say a thing, swallowed the bit of cake but when he opened his mouth Mello started again, beating him to it: "and I know you don't feel that way about me, but I love you and I can't help it, and I tried not to and I miserably failed, and I know you think I'm weird and not nice and not attractive and you don't like to be close to me and stuff and—"

"What gave you the impression that I don't like you?" L frowned.

"Well, you never want to touch me and stuff," Mello said quickly, as if he wanted to get that part over with. "But that's not the point. It's just that I thought you should know and before you yell at me, I promise not to come near you again, and I'll be a nice kid and I won't touch you or look at you and—"

"Mello, it's okay." L took another piece of cake, looking away from the boy. Mello's eyes widened. His hands dropped to his sides as he leaned over to sit on his knees—he looked anxious, and a small grin tugged on his lips.

"How okay?" He demanded curiously.

"What?" L murmured confused through the chomping on the cake.

"I need to know the exact okay-ness-factor of this." Mello said sternly, putting one hand on his hip.

L seemed to be thinking. Then he put down his plate on the side-table, and turned to the blonde. Before Mello could bitch again, he pulled the younger boy between his legs, connecting their lips in a sweet kiss—though it wasn't the first one they'd shared.

When they separated Mello stumbled a bit, trying to balance his weight on his arms as he hovered over L. They shared one of those love-'n-daisies moments—or that's what Matsuda wanted to believe as he drooled at his favourite couple—looking each other right in the eye, before L said: "it's okay." With his odd smile on his face.

"So I can still bunk in your bed at night?" Mello asked—with what seemed to be the first form of his well-known feral grin.

L nodded, reaching over to spoon some cake up.

"And God will forgive me?"

L nodded again, and Mello's grin grew, as he dipped down his head again.

Light huffed before he even knew why, but no one noticed as L's bedroom came in view. Or more like... L's bed came in view—since that was all they could see. And two boys of course, completely naked and spent, panting softly. L's skin contrasted harshly against the black sheets and Mello's tanned form. Mello shifted his head to lie more comfortably on L's shoulder, and his finger drew lazy figures around L's exposed bellybutton.

"Did you enjoy your present?" His voice was hoarse, and had a playful twinge to it—Light decided that was the post-sex glow sounding through. They were talking about the 'present' headquarters had seen on the previous tape.

"Oh, very much." L nodded—his voice was deeper than usual, which was a real accomplishment.

"Thought you would, you perv," the blonde said lovingly. "Next year I'll combine it with strawberry short-cake."

"Hmm, why do I never think of that?" L pondered, and his eyes glazed over at the mere thought of Mello and cake together.

"Because you're smart in the 'L-is-justice' way," Mello kissed the man's chest, grin in place. He crawled on top of him, hands on the man's sides. L quirked up an eyebrow. "While my intelligence leans more to the 'make-L-cry-out-my-name-later' way," Soichiro felt an urge to gasp at the boy's plain boldness—but than again, he couldn't very well blame him, since they were thought to be on their own. "Now I think my present is getting you frisky again," he gave a meaningful look and L smiled. "Let me fix that for you."

And Matsuda muttered a dark: "kuso!" when the screen went black—the others agreed, but in their heads. The monitor stayed that way for a long moment, and they thought it was the end of the tape, when suddenly the bedroom appeared again. Only now they were much younger, and not naked.

"Why do you never sleep?" Mello muttered to the man next to him.

L was typing and Mello huddled deeper under the black blankets, trying to fall asleep. He looked thirteen or so, and absolutely innocent, with his hair tangled slightly, as it stuck out from under the covers.

"I sleep—just not right now." L commented, typing away undisturbed.

"Liar—you never sleep. Maybe two hours, maximum. I think I'd know since I'm the person that sleeps next to you," Mello opened his eyes, looking at him. "Why?"

"I never find a nice position for my head," L admitted. Headquarters was shocked! Was that the reason he never slept... that couldn't be! That was so... stupid. Light thought he would've had an ultra-strange yet smart reason—like why he always sat with his legs tucked tightly to his chest. Not to mention he always claimed that 'Kira doesn't sleep either'. "It always feels weird and I wake up after a couple of hours—and by than I don't need the sleep anymore."

"That's it?" Mello laughed, obviously finding the reason as ridicule as them. "I thought you had some really L-like explanation. Put your computer away," the blonde sat up a bit, and L reluctantly shut his laptop off. "Matt sometimes has the same problem, come here."

And before L could protest the boy lay down again, putting L's head on his clothed stomach. L blinked twice—it felt particularly... good.

"And if it doesn't work you'll have to try harder, because the glow of the computer is interrupting my sleeping pattern." Mello chuckled.

"I can feel that." L said softly—talking about his chuckling.

He wrapped his arms around the boy's form, one on top of the blankets.

"Maybe that's because you're using my stomach as a pillow—aren't you supposed to be smart, oh great detective L."

"Don't mock my wisdom, you brat." L closed his eyes—Mello chuckled again.

"'m not mocking your wisdom—more the lack of it."

They both laughed and then it was a suddenly oddly quiet—Light noticed L was wearing pyjamas, white ones. He'd never seen those before.

"It's really soft." L whispered, breaking the silence again.

"I know—it's silk, of course it's soft," Mello grinned, and closed his eyes too, content and at ease. "It's really a contradiction—the pj's are so soft while my skin's all harsh and shit, tss," he complained faintly. "Getting old sucks."

L laughed again.

"You're not old," he moved his head a bit higher, to rest at the small boy's chest—he could feel the heartbeat and it was magic. "And I'm sure your skin isn't harsh."

"No, it is," Mello said convinced of his right, and he took one of L's hands, and put it under his sleepshirt. "Feel that?"

"It's not harsh," L closed his eyes, and Mello put his hand on L's, but above his clothing instead of under. "You're the softest person in the world."

And Mello fell asleep, a surreal smile tugging on his lips.

Soichiro decided that perhaps the two boys together weren't that bad at all—they got along well, and if the great L was happy, he supposed it should just do. Then his attention returned to the screen, as Mello came in view again—only now he was older and his expression wasn't that peaceful. He was positioned on the toilet-lit, legs spread wide—they could see everything there was to see, since he was completely naked—as he put a yellow lotion on his ankle. Light noticed there was a dark spot right above his groin, and wondered what it was—he was sitting too far away to know for sure.

Next he got out a small plastic tube, and put his feet to the floor, legs still spread as he examined the spot by his groin—the others now noticed it too. He was just starting to put some of the contents of the tube on the spot, when L appeared in the doorway. He was wearing a white button-down shirt, which reached right below the curve of his ass, and he stepped inside the room, rubbing the back of his leg with his foot, as he regarded the scene with his thumb posed on his lip.

Mello looked up when he noticed he wasn't alone, and smiled at the older raven.

"What's wrong babe?" He asked sweetly—an upright kind of sweet, and it made Matsuda's insides melt—as he continued rubbing his own skin. It was then that Light realised what the black spot might be. "Did I wake you?"

L shook his head and Mello tipped up an eyebrow. The man merely came closer, and flopped down to the floor right in front of Mello—resting his head against the toilet-seat. They could see his naked, pale thighs, though Mello's intimates were now conveniently blocked out of sight by L's head. Mello rubbed his foot against the man's calve, and closed the plastic tube, whipping his hand on a towel.

"Had a bad dream again then?" Mello questioned, reaching over to get some gauze from the sink. L shook his head once more, and Mello slid his free had through his dark hair. "Tell me what woke you up sweetheart."

"I was thinking about whether it hurt or not," L said, in a sleepy voice. His eyes strayed up to where Mello should be, but since his back was turned on the boy he couldn't actually see him. "And whether it means you really love me."

"Of course I really love you," Mello frowned, covering the black spot up with the gauze. "I didn't get the tattoo to prove that I really love you—it's just so everyone knows I'm yours."

He let his hands go down from L's shoulder to his hand, then settle on his hip as he leaned forward to kiss the man on his cheek. He hugged him from behind, and L shifted forward, so Mello could drop down to the floor behind him—being somewhat squished between the toilet and L—he wrapped his arms safely around L's body.

"You shouldn't be out of bed baby," Mello whispered softly against his ear, and he unbuttoned one of the buttons, sliding his hand into the gap, under the white shirt. "You should have a proper night's sleep," he popped open another button and they noticed the fact that L's torso was wrapped in a bandage—they also noticed L wasn't wearing any underwear. "I promised Watari I'd make sure you slept well."

"Can we just stay like this a little longer?" L said in a hushed voice, and Mello's fingers stroked lovingly over the bandage.

"Of course," Mello kissed his jaw and wrapped his arms firmer around L's body. "We can stay for as long as you want."

This time when the screen went black it stayed black and Light pushed a button, retracting the tape.

"I wonder what his tattoo says," Matsuda commented, grinning widely—a hurt L and a Mello that took care of him, was just too much for Matsuda to handle. The others agreed, except for Soichiro, who stayed quiet on the matter—he wasn't really sure if they should be discussing this. "I wanna have a close-up on it," he admitted. "Do you suppose L will ever explain it to us though, the tapes? Or if Mello ever will?"

"I doubt it," Light smiled, turning in his chair a bit. "But if we're lucky, the tapes will be so kind to help us out with that."

"Oh yes!" Matsuda cheered. "Let's watch ano—"

A high girly voice interrupted him: "you've got Mello-message! Please forgive us for the interruption!"

"Never mind," Matsuda muttered, as a window popped up. "This is better anyways."

The blonde was wearing a black waistcoat, the red beads of his rosary shinning in the light of his webcam. He wasn't looking at the screen, instead his eyes were fixed on a point a bit to the left—Light suspected he was busy on his computer.

"I'm sorry for interrupting—I tried to call Watari," they heard clicks from on the other side. "But..." he paused when his eyes made contact with those of everyone in the room. "Oh, excuse me," he quirked an eyebrow. Matsuda started slapping his palms together in excitement. "I was looking for L."

They were silent for a minute, all a bit shocked. They were talking to Mello—obviously L's lover—and L wasn't there. Soichiro was the first to speak up, moving to stand behind Light's chair.

"I'm sorry, L left a while ago." The old man smiled, and Mello looked surprised.

"Oh?"

"We don't know where-to," Soichiro said, bowing slightly. "I can give him a message if you want."

"That's okay, I'll..." the boy averted his eyes, scratching at a piece of paper, when the redhead came in.

"Hey, Mels, they said—"

"Never mind Matt," Mello looked up, giving him a smile. "L's not there anyway, so it don't matter," he looked back at the screen, giving the people at Headquarters a nod. "I'm sorry to have interrupted your work. Good-day."

"Are you sure you don't want to leave a message?" Soichiro pressed—Light noticed he was going into full father-mode, and he understood why.

Mello looked slightly hurt by L's absence, and his father was trying to make that better for him. Though he'd probably fail, knowing the blonde's stubbornness.

"No, it's not relevant, really, thank you."

"Do you want me to tell him you called?" Soichiro asked.

"Don't mention it," the blonde shrugged. "Just forget it. Thanks." And before Light's father could protest, he closed the window.

Light frowned—he wanted to comment, but someone entered the building. Clicking some buttons the security cameras in the hall came in view, opening in a window. It were L and Watari, talking silently to each other. Watari was carrying white paper bags, and L had a lollypop in his mouth. This was so typical—just when Mello hung up, they came to the office again. Light sighed and leaned back in his chair.

"We have to tell L," he said. "He can call back immediately."

"But the boy doesn't want us to tell." Soichiro protested.

"He's just being stubborn," Light frowned at the screen. L and Watari were nearly there. "We should tell him."

"But—" the door opened.

They all turned to L a bit nervously, and L stopped when he noticed their stares. Waiting for someone to talk, he sucked the lolly in his mouth. Watari smiled and went up the stairs. L blinked and Matsuda fidgeted in his chair.

"Mello called." Ide suddenly said—very fast and almost incoherently.

"When?" L asked, taking the lolly from his mouth and fishing his cellphone from his jeans—Soichiro sighed, putting his palm against his forehead in agitation.

"Just now." Light said.

L nodded, putting the phone to his ear in that weird way only L could. He went over, sitting down on the sofa as the phone rung, waiting for the other end to be picked up. When he heard the click and the blonde's voice, he put the lolly to his lips again, giving it a suck.

"Mello? I'm sorry that I wasn't here, Watari and I needed to go shopping." He said in somewhat of a slur, due to the candy in his mouth.

The boy answered something and L laughed, getting up again and leaving the room. Light stared at his retreating back, and Matsuda gave a wistful sigh. Then he realised Watari had been carrying a lot of bags, and wondered what had been in those—not to mention why exactly Mello had called. At this rate, mysteries would only bottle up, without ever getting an answer! Matsuda groaned and bumped his head into the table—he hoped he'd know soon, because the tension was killing him. Light didn't agree out loud, but deep down he knew he wanted to bump his head into the table, just like Matsuda was doing.

**AN1: Wauw. Did that take me too long? Because I wasn't sure whether to update or not… you know… so, if anyone wants me to update, don't forget to review! And… have you noticed I keep inventing Mello-terms? First I had Mello-message, now Mello-hiatus. Tss.**

**AN2: In my head Mello is like the only person that can call L babe or baby and get away with it. With them it seems… natural. Whilst when anyone else would try it, I think I'd just find it weird.**


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